Every once in awhile I get a bit stuck on what to do for the list, but usually inspiration in some form strikes. This time it was my two and a half year old son sinking his teeth into my shoulder from behind that got me thinking about horror biters.
It’s a nasty business getting killed that way. All chomps, grinds and chewing while you suffer excruciating pain and a not at all quick death. In other words total genre awesomeness!
So check out a bunch of creatures and peeps that would love to take a hunk or two out of your torso. And as always, if I miss your fav then spit bullets below!
READ PART 1 OF THIS LIST HERE WARNING – S&M FETISH MATERIAL AHEAD! 5. Crawlers, THE DESCENT One of my favorite horror films of recent years started off as a chick flick, turned into a nature gone amok flick, and ended up as a WTF!? was that flick. The answer to the last question is, that was a Crawler. Think Deliverance but stuck under ground for who knows how long and very, very hungry. Ned Beatty might just have gotten off easy.
4. Hannibal Lecter, SILENCE OF THE LAMBS Hard to think of anything more terrifying than being a census taker in this particular man’s household. Sure Lecter comes across all refined and shite for most of the movie, but as soon as he lets loose on those unfortunate guards you realize just how brutal his preferred motive of killing gets when applied in the real world.
3. Great White Shark, JAWS I’ll admit that the theme from this f*cking movie still plays in my head anytime I enter a body of water larger than an above ground pool. Intellectually I know that you have a better chance of surviving a shark attack than say, a lion attack. But it just seems like a totally unfair fight when your opponent gets to take a shot from down under.
2. Reapers, BLADE II I know that snakes have detachable jaws, but a split-flowering jaw with massive mandibles really takes that equation in a totally asskicking direction. Just the idea of a supervampire that has other vampires pissing their pants is pretty great, but leave it to Guillermo del Toro to come up with a creature that injects itself into your head like heroin takes over your veins.
1. Alien, ALIEN A protruding jaw contained within a toothy jaw? Are you kidding me?! How infinitely f*cked up is that? I don’t know what Giger was smoking to come up with these vicious bastards, but give him credit. He’s probably launched more nightmares than Jenna Jameson has launched baby batter. Lots of scary stuff out there, but the double jaw is definitely unbelievable.
READ PART 1 OF THIS LIST HERE Got a Top 10 idea? Hit me up at mattwithers@joblo.com