This Week: Pulling the plug on Taken, Jennifer Aniston cuts deep with Cake, and going back to the future (of 1997) with Escape From New York.
► ‘Taken 2’ was already too much of a good thing, but TAKEN 3? It’s not hard to see why Liam Neeson is winding down his action movie career – he’s getting too old for this shit. Trying to raise the stakes, they bypass the kidnapping and dump a dead body in his bedroom (alas, his ex-wife) and police think he’s the killer. You’ll likely guess who framed him in the first ten minutes, which makes an already tired sequel the worst of the trilogy.
► Jennifer Aniston gave it her all in the somber drama CAKE, but that Oscar nomination still eludes her. She’s a member of a support group for chronic pain, and is introduced by mocking a member (Anna Kendrick) who recently killed herself. Separated from her husband and addicted to pain killers, she starts a friendship with the suicide victim’s husband (Sam Worthington). Considering the subject matter this isn’t a showy performance from Aniston, just an assured, heartbreaking one.
► Shout! Factory continues its John Carpenter marathon with a slick new 2-disc edition of ESCAPE FROM NEW YORK, throwing in new commentary from Adrienne Barbeau, new featurettes, and the original bank robbery opening. You also get a new 2K High Def transfer from the original negative. Like everything Carpenter did in the early ‘80s, it found its true audience years after its theatrical run. What’s freaky is realizing the grim future world it was set in was nearly 20 years ago.
► She’s been Oscar nominated. She’s been Golden Raspberry nominated. She’s done ‘Frida,’ she’s done ‘Grown Ups 2.’ Salma Hayek’s done a bit of everything, and with EVERLY she tries carrying an action flick on her own. She plays a prostitute trapped in her apartment, fighting off waves of attackers sent by her sadistic former lover, a mob boss (Hiroyuki Watanabe). He even offers the other prostitutes in her building a bounty if they kill her.
► A vampire flick set in Iran, A GIRL WALKS HOME ALONE AT NIGHT finds a lonely bloodsucker prowling an Iranian ghost town called Bad City (because Sin City was taken). A weird relationship develops, blood flows, and this weirdly comical mix of Sergio Leone and David Lynch becomes a modern vampire classic. Directed by Ana Lily Amirpour, based on her comic.
► Just from the title, do I really have to tell you ARACHNOQUAKE is from SyFy? Albino spiders emerge from fissures after an earthquake, and do what albino spiders do – mess shit up. Enter Edward Furlong, who realizes a.) They hate sunlight, and b.) His career has hit that level below rock bottom. Seriously, there’s a new Terminator movie out this year and this is what he’s doing now? If it’s any consolation, he’s joined by Growing Pains’ Tracey Gold.
► John Cena was one-and-out with ‘The Marine’ franchise. Ted Dibiase, Jr. stepped in for the sequel. But with Part 3 and now THE MARINE 4: MOVING TARGET, it has been Mike ‘The Miz’ Mizanin’s show. He’s back as Jake Carter, assigned to protect a hot whistle-blower (Melissa Roxburgh) who’s going to expose a military defense contractor. Naturally, the military sends their finest to deal with her. One thing they forgot: He’s The Miz, and he’s awwweeeesooooome.
► Well this was inevitable. THE WALKING DECEASED finds a sheriff fresh out a coma, his 10-year-old son, and a group of survivors (who for some reason name themselves after cities) fleeing the undead for safe ground. Oh, there’s also a zombie who has convinced the group he’s just mentally challenged. ‘Walking Dead’ fans poke fun at the show enough, I doubt there’s a joke in this movie they haven’t already thought of.
Also out this week:
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SO WHAT DVD/BLU-RAYS ARE YOU GUYS STOKED ABOUT THIS WEEK?!