We all have movies we love. Movies we respect without question because of either tradition, childhood love, or because they’ve always been classics. However, as time keeps ticking, do those classics still hold up? So…the point of this here column is whether or not a film stands the test of time. I’m not gonna question whether it’s still a good flick, but if the thing holds up for a modern audience.
Director: William Castle
Starring: Vincent Price, Carol Ohmart, and Elisha Cook Jr.
It seems most horror fans know the iconic directors of the genre…especially those who came up during the 1970s and 80s. Mention names like Carpenter, Romero, Craven, and Raimi and most folks know ‘em. But go older and there aren’t a lot of “name” horror icons beyond Hitchcock. But that shouldn’t be because some real crazy bastards out there did good work, guys like William Castle. Here was a dude who knew how to scare audiences, or at least did everything he could to get them to shit themselves. Never afraid of trying something new (like putting "shockers" under seats or having skeletons fly around theaters). I think 99% of his movies have been remade (I didn’t do well at math so double-check that). However, out of all his films, one in 1959 seems most famous, but does it still hold up?
Under the examination: House on Haunted Hill
I can hear you!
THE STORY: Much like the 1999 remake, House on Haunted Hill focuses on eccentric millionaire Fredrick Loren who is a bit of an asshole. You know the kind, a guy who likes to f*ck with people and help clean their colons with fright. Namely, he enjoys scaring his fourth wife (they enjoy attempting to kill each other) and a group of folks he invited for a party to stay the night inside a haunted house. The catch? They will get ten grand…as long as they survive. But are the ghosts and ghouls real?
WHAT STILL HOLDS UP: Well, let’s start with the obvious: Mr. Vincent Price. Honestly, it’s a not surprising that we have no modern equivalent to him. Maybe Bruce Campbell? Maybe Jeffrey Combs? I dig both those guys, but let's not get stupid. Neither come close to Price, a man who seemed to exude a nice dose of creep with a simple grin, or his little mustache, or his strange voice inflections, or his towering height, or maybe the fact he ended up in every horror movie (without ever overstaying his welcome). That's pretty impressive, and he's equally impressive here as a millionaire jerk. The role isn't deep, but deep enough for Price to enjoy himself.
Price looks like a good listener.
Loren a great character, too, because he’s 100% asshole with a flair for the dramatics. Case in point: when his house guests arrive at the house, he has funeral cars bring them with a family friendly hearse leading the way. That's dramatic, but film has some great creep here, especially the end (SPOILER) where Price’s skeleton rises from an acid pit to shove his wife into the very same acid pit. Yeah, it looks fake as hell, but it's so demented and evil that it plays out fantastic. When she's dead, his final line ends up probably the best. He says goodbye to his killers before he declares, “It’s a pity you didn’t know when started your game of murder… that I was playing, too.” (END). That's pretty cold…and cool..
What’s not to love about the simple yet nasty premise, which Price explains nearly on time near the 15 minute mark. It’s a murder house. They’re locked in. They can't escape unless they’re dead until the sun rises. Simple. Oh, and I love the theme of the film too. How far can a person be pushed before they break, before they can kill? That's what the movie intends to find out.
STOP SCREAMING!
WHAT BLOWS NOW: For a 1959 cheap B flick, I better not bitch about the cheap effects, props, and pacing. They’re dated…like any 50 plus year old movie without much of a budget. It can't help but play unavoidably dated, and in some places worse than others. However, I will bitch about the story, not the premise. For a movie with a 75 minute runtime, Castle really needed some more plot. They basically extended a quick premise (of putting people into a haunted house to survive) into a feature, hoping to idea and Price could carry it. He does, but it would have been better to add at least a few more plot twists to keep things moving.
And then there's the notable pacing…and the fact there’s nothing scary any more in House on Haunted Hill. The movie plays more like camp now than horror, which obviously means that element doesn’t hold up. But unlike an old comedy (which if it isn’t funny anymore it’s near impossible to watch), horror keeps entertainment value. We can still watch people scream and die, enjoying every minute of it (that sounds…bad). What House on Haunted Hill really needed was a new set or two. Holy cow, it’s so freakin’ cheap looking. I’ve seen high school theater productions with more believable sets. And those I can see the lights, sandbags, and, well, an audience.
Lastly, while Price, his wife (the very pretty Carol Ohmart) and Pritchard (the great character actor Elisha Cook) all come out perfectly nasty, the rest of the cast needed some variety. Perhaps they needed a Taye Diggs, but more likely something beyond stock stereotypes. They’re just not that interesting. The worst being our “hero” Schroeder (Richard Long), who is a little too earnest for his own good.
THE VERDICT: A little slow, really dated production that still works because of a nasty premise and one Mr. Vincent Price. It's not going to scare anyone anymore, but that doesn't mean it can't still entertain. House on Haunted Hill's premise is one that never gets old, especially one as creepy and perfectly Halloween-centric like a Price haunted house movie.
GET HOUSE ON HAUNTED HILL DVD HERE
"Dance with the devil…pale moon night…"