THE BLACK SHEEP is an ongoing column featuring different takes on films that either the writer HATED, but that the majority of film fans LOVED, or that the writer LOVED, but that most others LOATH. We’re hoping this column will promote constructive and geek fueled discussion. Dig in!
Jason X (2001)
Directed by James Isaac
“It plays like a perfectly molded over piece of slice of cheese. ”
Just so everyone knows, I’m not here to lay claim that Jason X is the best movie ever made. Nope, it ain’t. Nor will I claim it’s been horrifically overlooked. It really hasn’t been. Anyone with a pair of working eyeballs can glance at the goofy poster and know this isn’t quality material.
Instead, what I want to state is pretty simple. Jason X is one of those movies that when watched today — a decade (really?!) after its initial release — it plays like a perfectly molded over piece of slice of cheese. The kind of slice you want to throw away as soon as you see it. But for some reason, the urge to look at it a little closer, to sniff it, to see if it’s really as bad as it seems. One I can only imagine that it made Joe Bob Briggs proud. Sure, the SyFy Channel has managed to bring back the B movie formula to mainstream audiences in a big way, but those films are on a different level of stupid. They stretch premises to new heights and hire has-been stars.
I don’t believe the makers of Jason X intended to go that route…to be laughable bad. After all, this is the Friday the 13th franchise. It has never been the best, acting like a slutty, disowned step-sister of the other franchises, but it served its purpose of slicing up both the guts and the laughs (yes, their jokes are as bad as that sentence)! Seriously though, this franchise always walked the line between horror and comedy. And considering this is the first entry without Friday in the title, it’s a clear indictor they wanted a bold new direction. (After all, nothing spells unique like the tenth film in a series.) At least I think so.
Shoving Jason into space isn’t exactly a novel concept. The Leprechaun did it. Dracula did it. Ice Cube did it. The Simpsons did it. I’m surprised Halloween didn’t do it (though I believe there rumors of Quentin Tarantino wanting to send Mike Myers into space). The concept works to a certain extent if you never think about it, and it’s hard to fault the filmmakers for trying something new. The space aspect is enjoyable, but there’s the Alien Resurrection moment I can’t not mention Jason’s transformation. Yeah…that part is…dumb. A mutant, part metal, part psycho with bad attitude beating up people is…dumb. Thankfully, that’s only within the last 15 minutes or so, and by that point, the only sensible answer is, “Oh, why the f**k not.”
Regardless, Jason X works as long as you know what you’re in for. The acting is on par with soft-core porn. The dialogue is about as obvious as a 12-piece jigsaw puzzle. The space setting looks as believable as Mike Tyson looks sane. The music sounds about as generic as, well, generic movie music. But combined, Jason X manages to create something unique. Something few movies, no matter how hard they try, succeed at becoming…a perfect celluloid slice of cheese.
Of course, there’s a element of Jason X that works beyond goofiness. What really made it work are the kill shots. Man, does this movie deliver. It plays like pornographic death as Jason stabs, strangles, beats, freezes, impales, maims, and slaughters non-stop through the perfect 90-minute run time. It feels like he’s knocking someone off every few minutes with his machete. The murder is so steady and unrelenting, it’s impossible not to enjoy it on some level…even if murder and mayhem ain’t your thing.
Disagree? Get the DVD and discover for yourself.