All jewel thief Miles Logan wants to do is get his diamond back and then disappear for a while. But when he poses as one of the men in blue to retrieve his loot, he gets a rep as one of the boldest, baddest, funniest cops to ever flash an L.A.P.D. badge. If he isn’t careful, he may get just what he deserves… a promotion.

Two years ago the shrewd, fast-talking Logan (Martin Lawrence) barely escapes with his life when his carefully planned heist of a $20 million diamond goes awry. Double-crossed by Deacon (Peter Greene), a greedy member of his crew, Miles makes a daring escape to a nearby building under construction and hides the gem in an air duct before being captured by the police. As he is taken away, he memorizes and repeats his location like a mantra: “Third floor, north side… Corner of Fifth and Grand.”

Two years later and newly released from prison, Miles is about to take on the biggest challenge of his career, with hilarious results. He returns to his hiding spot, the corner of Fifth and Grand, only to discover that the unfinished building where he hid the diamond is now the new 37th L.A. Police Precinct. Undaunted by this ironic stroke of bad luck-and unable to infiltrate the precinct disguised as a bucktoothed pizza delivery man-Miles concocts an outrageous plan to con his way into the L.A.P.D. by impersonating a cop and, if everything goes according to schedule, to locate and retrieve the gem in a matter of hours.

Courtesy of forged transfer papers and self-taught police training via episodes of “COPS,” Miles arrives as the highly decorated ‘Detective Malone’ at the 37th Precinct’s burglary division walking the walk and talking the talk of a seasoned-not to mention boisterous and totally irreverent-police veteran. When Miles-looking for the diamond in an air vent in the men’s room-inadvertently captures an escaping suspect, he comes to the attention of Captain Rizzo (Graham Beckel). Impressed with Miles’ glowing “credentials,” Rizzo partners Miles with Carlson (Luke Wilson), a newly promoted detective who is a bit green and eager to work with someone who has a little more experience under his holster.

Miles is immediately put to the test when he and his new partner are called out to a crime scene. He soon realizes that his expertise in theft has made him an ideal burglary detective. Though Miles and Carlson quickly strike up a rapport, the other detectives in their unit aren’t accustomed to Miles’ lively and unorthodox style of working. But it gets results, and soon Miles becomes the toast of the unit-a felon-out-of-water winning the admiration of his ‘fellow cops’ with his uncanny ability to ‘think like a criminal.’ Public defender Melissa Green (Nicole Ari Parker) remains the sole skeptic, but is nevertheless intrigued and amused by Miles’ bravado.

Miles soon locates the diamond, but retrieving it is another matter. His bizarre antics and snooping around in the squad room begin to draw attention from his co-workers. Even worse, Miles’ past threatens to catch up with him when his bumbling former partner-in-crime/getaway driver, Tulley (Dave Chappelle), resurfaces.

As if that’s not enough, Miles becomes tangled up in department politics and a major drug trafficking case-both of which might foil his plan to reclaim the diamond. The reappearance of Deacon, who wants to lay claim to the jewel, further complicates matters, culminating in a wild desert stand-off complete with drug dealers, the FBI, L.A.P.D. and DEA all wanting to know the answer to one question: just who is this ‘Detective Malone’?