Salem’s Lot has a legendary status not unlike the vampire creatures that are the chief antagonists therein. While we are finally getting the newest movie adaptation this month after what seemed like an eternity in development and then an unceremonious shelving, the original continues to have a cult classic aura around it. There was a second TV miniseries that came out on TNT in 2004 but the quality of that one varies depending on who you talk to. Even with all the cache that the original miniseries brings to the table, it had been years since I had watched it. It deserved a revisit and make no mistake, this addition to the King cinematic universe needed a remake more than nearly anything else he has put out.

Originally Salem’s Lot was going to be a theatrical experience but Warner Brothers, who had purchased the rights, had a hard time settling on the story and the personnel. They took in numerous screenplay options from names like Larry Cohen and Robert Getchell and originally even approached George Romero about directing but the 400 plus page novel seemed daunting to faithfully recreate in one big screen film. Warner Brothers then turned to their TV division and decided to make it a miniseries event at the tail end of the 70’s which was the decade of the made for TV movie, particularly in the horror realm. Producer Richard Kobritz was given the challenge to get the project made and the two driving forces he chose were screenwriter Paul Monash to deliver the screenplay and then after watching The Texas Chainsaw Massacre, he wanted Tobe Hooper to direct.

Hooper is one of the horror legends that we hold up on high with the likes of John Carpenter and Wes Craven even if his output doesn’t quite have the same legacy or stand the test of time. While Chainsaw is a juggernaut and will never go away, others just don’t jump out as easily. Sure, Poltergeist is credited to him, and it doesn’t sound like anyone will argue that fact, but it jumps out as feeling different from his other works. He does still have greats like the first Chainsaw sequel and space vampire madhouse Lifeforce as well as lesser greats like Eaten Alive, The Funhouse, and Invaders from Mars. The rest of his catalogue isn’t really that impressive, from his other theatrical flops to strait to video dreck. Hooper is one to be celebrated for sure, but this movie is much more in line with the rest of his contributions rather than the outlier that is TCM.

Monash was a classic TV writer from the early ’50s all the way to his death in 2003. He did add in some fun movie credits like The Law Breakers and The Friends of Eddie Coyle but mostly stayed on the small screen. Two of his biggest credits there are adapting Peyton Place for television and writing an episode of the TV event V. The Primetime Emmy winner isn’t discussed much but certainly had his place in history. The cast for Salem’s Lot could have been bigger but the screen adaptation ended up mixing characters together or cutting some completely. This sounds like a recipe for disaster when adapting a large story but King himself came out and said Monash did a really good job consolidating the material and the story remained similar at heart. Well, mostly.

Chosen for some of the roles were Fred Willard, Geoffrey Lewis, Ed Flanders, Elijah Cook Jr., Bonnie Bedelia, and even James Mason with David Soul as the main author character Ben here. This would be one of many author characters that King throws into his work to be an avatar for himself. This selection of actors mostly works. The old timers in particular like Mason, Cook Jr, and Flanders all own their roles and are every bit as interesting on screen as you would hope. The TV movie had a 4-million-dollar budget and aimed to be a big hit for the studio on TV. So, what did we get?

On paper this is mostly a success. The TV event was nominated for 3 Emmys, had mostly good critical reception, and captured TV viewership at greater levels than they anticipated. This only tells part of the story, however, as the now cult classic has its fair share of problems. The first and most glaring is how slow it is. Notice I don’t say the length of the movie. Length isn’t the problem here as a movie can be 3 plus hours and be just fine. No, I mean it’s slow. The movie runs 183 minutes but feels like it could be 300 minutes. There is a lot of just meandering around or extended conversations that don’t need to be as drawn out as they are. There are some good instances of this like most scenes with James Mason or anything with the town sheriff played by Kenneth McMillan who I couldn’t figure out why I knew him for the longest time until his eyebrows reminded me that he was the first Baron Harkonnen that we got to watch on screen.

The story itself is an interesting one with King being inspired by his class reading the Bram Stoker classic. He apparently wondered what would happen if vampires came to America, specifically to a small town. Events coincide when author Ben Mears comes back home to write about a legendary house and a pair of antique dealers open up a shop. The townsfolk start to die off or disappear and Mears starts to suspect that the new pair are vampires, or at least one of them is. He is able to convince the town doctor, and father of his love interest, but most of the town has either been killed or turned. He and a young boy who no longer has a family are able to kill the head vampire and his not quite human protector but are unable to save most of the town. They flee to regroup and are hunted by the remaining vampires, knowing that they will continue to be hunted until they or the vampires die.

The biggest issue with the movie just dragging on is that the main character we follow, Ben Mears, is a bit of a dud. The character itself is fine as an author returning to his hometown after being obsessed with what he saw at a now allegedly haunted house but actor David Soul lacks any of what his last name suggests. The character is played with almost no charisma and even less chemistry with the lovely Bonnie Bedelia. What could have been a really neat love story or even partnership against the main vampires feels every bit the slog that the actionless scenes feel like. Soul has a good look and reason to be there, but it just falls flat. Its really hard to get excited about the movie when the main character is someone you can’t wait for the film to move past.

While this isn’t our adaptation show, it has to be said that one of the biggest changes, and one that gets called out the most, is the change from the lead vampire from a debonaire aristocrat to a temu version of Count Orlock from Nosferatu. The series may have been nominated for makeup, but a new Blu-ray transfer does it no favors. I actually like the way he is supposed to look, but the movie falls flat when trying to pull it off. What We Do in the Shadows was able to make the look intentionally funny but here it loses its fear in a way that was certainly not what they were going for. He is supposed to be this very imposing figures and it’s disheartening that one of his best moody entrances, when he enters as a cape through the window, is ruined when he kills someone’s parents with a gag straight out of a Three Stooges short. My memory had this creature much more frightening than he actually is and the only time he almost lives up to his reputation is at the climax when they find him in his coffin.

The fear to non-fear ratio struggles mightily here too. It would be one thing if there was payoff for the long stretches that the movie makes you wait but there isn’t anything close to what you’d call a payoff here. The scenes that get the job done vary between ones you remember and ones that sneak up on your memory as you watch them. Probably the best scene in the whole thing comes when caretaker Mike played by Geoffrey Lewis has been bitten and starts turning only to come back to his friend’s house as a vampire. We see him slowly rocking back and forth in a chair with his piercing vampire eyes all but stealing the shot. It’s great subtle stuff that plays into the low budget and remains with you long after the movie is over. That’s the one that everyone remembers but the other really terrifying part comes at the end when Ben and Mark are trying to kill Barlow in his coffin. Mark is watching Ben try to overpower Barlow in his coffin and his victims/acolytes slowly crawl towards Mark and Ben both to stop the murder but also feed. Again, the budget here isn’t an issue as the filming and tension do all the work.

The other scene that most people remember, hell that is used in a lot of top horror scenes lists, is when one of the towns youngest victims’ floats to his friends’ windows and asks to come in. its filmed in reverse to give it its attempted eerie effects but what should be harrowing and tragic like the zombie kids at the fuel station in Dawn of the Dead, just doesn’t work here. Lots of people dying off screen combined with slow builds that don’t go anywhere leave the movie in a precocious spot of trusting that what we see on screen is worth the wait and it’s just not. What is undeniably one of King’s best works, and one that comes back both in a short story form as well as one of the characters showing up in his magnum opus series The Dark Tower, ends up falling flat on the small screen.

The movie was cut into a much smaller 112-minute theatrical version, think the opposite of Needful Things, which was blown up into a TNT event, but that version isn’t ever brought up even if King himself seemed to prefer it. Salem’s Lot isn’t a bad movie, it’s just a deeply flawed adaptation that rests on memories and legends to get by. Here’s hoping that the newest iteration finally does the King book proud.

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