Review: No Strings Attached

PLOT: Emma (Natalie Portman) and Adam (Ashton Kutcher) are friends who decide to enter into a sex-only relationship.
Of course, love complicates the matter with one of the two predictably
falling in love with the other despite their strict rules against such
tom-foolery.

REVIEW: It’s been awhile since I’ve seen a new romantic comedy that I could
watch — nay endure. Sure there have been great movies wherein the
rom-com is shoe-horned into a different genre altogether — hello,
ZOMBIELAND! — but a real-deal rom-com that’s just unapologetically
about love and relationships? It’s been awhile.

Much to my surprise, NO STRINGS ATTACHED has put an end to that desert
of emotion. Sure, you quickly and rightly suspect that stars Natalie
Portman (Emma) and Ashton Kutcher (Adam) will end up together, but the
movie makes up for any predictability by adding a dash of realism that
calls the genre on its propensity to b.s. the audience into believing
relationships, make-ups, and break-ups are so simple.

What’s most refreshing about NO STRINGS ATTACHED is that it’s a
romantic comedy about two grown-ups who act like self-fulfilled
adults. Tired of the rom-com staple of a leading lady who must choose
between her job and love because her workaholic ways keep her from
realizing that her ladyparts need some attention of their own? Gone.
In its place is Portman portraying a medical intern who has a firm
hold of her work and life; she’s just afraid of relationships because
breaking-up hurts. As for the other rom-com cliche of the leading man
who’s equal parts manly man and man-child, he’s replaced by Kutcher as
a production assistant/aspiring staff writer on a Glee-knock-off who
is also smart and has a hold on his life — well, except when it comes
to getting out from under his father’s shadow. They’re just two normal
people dealing with love and how terrifying it is, while the laughs
come from their reactions and interactions with friends.

Now, I know what you’re thinking. You’re thinking I have no taste
because a. you’ve seen the trailers and they’re horrible and b. I’m a
woman. Well, here’s why you’re wrong: for reasons I don’t understand,
whomever was in charge of cutting the trailers did a terrible job.
Dialogue from different parts of the movie and cut scenes seem to have
been pieced together to create lines that never happened (but which
you’d expect of cliche rom-coms) and some scenes in the trailer just
have completely different dialogue playing over them — stuff that
doesn’t happen in the movie. Whatever movie the trailers are
advertising, I hate. But NO STRINGS ATTACHED, I loved. As for your
second thought, which is that you can’t trust my opinion because I’m a
woman… well, if you think that then you’re probably right. If you’re the type of person to write off my opinion
because I’m a woman, you’ll never understand what it is about NO STRINGS ATTACHED female-sympathetic perspective that makes it so great
and so real.

Portman redefines adorable in a role that could have devolved into a
one-note “Magical Pixie Dream Girl” but which she plays with nuance
and brash gusto for life. If you don’t love her reenactment of a man
standing in a room waving his penis around while shouting, then you
must not love much in life. As for Kutcher, he’s charmingly likable
without coming off as too-stupid-to-live or too-douchey-to-date. It’s
hard not to feel like, halfway through the film, you really are
watching two people fall in love, or rather try not to, thanks to the
pair’s budding chemistry.

The rest of the cast balances out the film, without taking too much
away from the main story at hand. Mindy Kaling
is sexy and fun as one of Emma’s roomies/fellow interns and
Lake Bell steals the show as a high-strung potential love interest.

For me, as a woman, it was satisfying and
heart-warming to finally watch a rom-com that was sympathetic to women
and the way we view relationships, which is not how 80 percent of
rom-coms like to think we do — and yes, plenty of female
screenwriters have been guilty of perpetuating myths and made-up rules
about women and love (e.g. you can only have career success or a man
to love). Still, it was great to see a film that was fun, funny, and
feminist. Emma gets to stay a doctor and get the guy she loves? Yes!
Adam isn’t a man-child that Emma has to babysit for the rest of her
life? Hurrah! They both love each other and respect each other?
Cheers!

I do have my critiques of the film, though. Sometimes I felt that NO STRINGS ATTACHED pulled a few of its punches, stopping just short of
being the movie it could be in the first half. But at some point
after, the film went for it and took me along for the ride. There also
could have been a bit more Cary Elwes (but I hold that opinion about
every movie he’s in) as the respected doctor at Emma’s hospital, and
more of Kaling and Emma’s other roommate, Guy (Guy Branum). While not
a perfect film, and not the best romantic comedy in history, NO STRINGS ATTACHED is a change of pace that reminds me the genre is
anything but dead or cliche past the point of return.