Popeye to eat spinach and punch bastards in new CGI, 3D film

I LOVED Popeye when I was little, but I HATED Spinach. So I used to eat lettuce (because it was green, you see) and then try picking fights with neighborhood kids, thinking I’d be invincible or able to uppercut them into outer space or something. But after starting to bleed from a straight pop to the schnoz, I realized then that television was just a great big fat liar. A pivotal childhood moment!

And it seems now that a whole new generation of kids with lax parents will be able to do what I did, as POPEYE gets set to punch his way onto the big screen in a whole new CG (and 3D) tale.

Producing for Sony will be Marvel super producer Avi Arad, with writer Mike Jones (POOL BOY, EVENHAND) in negotiations to hammer out the screenplay. According to Variety, “Arad says the new version will cover the themes of friendship, love, greed and life, and focus on human strengths and human frailties.” Naturally, Popeye’s main squeeze Olive Oyl, his arc-nemesis Bluto, and his adopted brat Swee’Pea will also partake in the adventure. (Where art thou, Wimpy?)

This isn’t the first time Popeye has graced silver screens. You may recall the 1980 Robert Altman (?!) film, which featured Robin Williams as the abnormally forearmed sailor and the perfectly cast Shelley Duvall as Olive Oyl. It also featured a musical soundtrack from the great Harry Nilsson, which I always thought was so f*cking weird.