Mr. 3000

A cocky, selfish baseball player quits his team after smacking his 3000th hit in the majors, sits back and waits to get inducted into the Baseball Hall of Fame. When he still hasn’t been let in after nine years, and the league discovers an error that shows him to have only 2997 hits, the cocky, selfish (now older) baseball player returns to the game, in order to complete his self-centered mission. Do you think he will learn any lessons about life and teamwork? I’ll give you one guess.

First of all, I want to clear something up. This film is not an all-out comedy, folks! I have no idea why its trailer is making it look like a slapstick hoot-and-a-half, but other than a few wisecracks by Bernie, a couple of goofy baseball players and one pissed-off sausage (one of the funniest sausages of all-time!), this movie played more like a drama than a comedy…at least to me. That said, it’s not really a “good movie” either, but a passable offering, for anyone who likes Bernie Mac, the game of baseball and those who don’t mind watching a movie that isn’t going to engage, one way or the other. Truly, it’s the kind of movie that will play much better as a video rental, but for me, I enjoyed Mac’s performance enough to recommend it, even slightly, in theaters. I’ve always been a fan of the Big Mac, awaiting his “break out” role, and I guess this film is a step in the right direction. The movie allows Mac to use words like “shit” and “ass” like the comedic pro that he is, but it also allows him to showcase an entirely different side, a side that I personally had never witnessed before…the dramatic one. That’s right, the man actually had to take partake in a few emotional moments as a washed-up ballplayer finally coming to grips with his limitations and mistakes from the past, and on the whole…I’d say he pulled it off quite well.

That said, not much else about the film was all that interesting, particularly the labored “relationship” that he shared with Angela Bassett (acting with her breasts…great acting!), the obvious “mentor” angle that he ultimately played up with one of the cockier, younger players, all of the film’s lame montages (although any movie that includes a Rob Bass song in its soundtrack, can’t be all bad), or shots of parts of the stands, which made it look like a bunch of extras pretending to be part of a bigger stadium. Meh. A couple of the goofy “betting” players on the team were cute, and Paul Sorvino’s “performance” as the manager was definitely unique, but on the whole, the players (especially his supposed best friend) were forgettable. Mac’s character transformation also felt a touch contrived as he seemed to go back-and-forth between the “asshole” and “nice guy” a little too much for a guy his age (dude, you still haven’t figured out what’s important in life by this point?) Then again, two words: Barry Bonds. The film also starts off weak and doesn’t really get going until about half an hour into the festivities, but if you hang in there and don’t go in assuming that it’s an “all-out” comedy, instead of a drama with “comedic moments”, you might appreciate some of it, as I did. It is tough though, especially since Mac’s character is a real prick at the beginning, who you’ll likely hate at first. Either way, Bernie Mac is the man and not a “son of a dick” and you can quote me on that.

(c) 2021 Berge Garabedian