This is Movie Jail, a unique maximum security prison that houses some of the worst writers, directors, actors and producers from Hollywood and beyond. Their crimes? The offenses vary from convict to convict but most of these inmates have contributed negatively to the film world to some capacity* and his or her misdeeds have covered a long enough period of time that the authorities had to intervene. In each column a defendant is put on trial, arguments are made, and then it is up to YOU, the jury, to decide if the person is guilty or not guilty of crimes against cinema. Their lives are in your hands, dude.
The Defendant
The Case
The Prosecution: Daddy's Home, Get Hard, Anchorman 2: The Legend Continues, Land of the Lost, Semi-Pro, Kicking & Screaming, Bewitched, Winter Passing, The Producers, Melinda and Melinda
Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, it looks like Will Ferrell has another hit on his hands with his latest movie Daddy's Home, however the comedy has failed to impress critics, and it's his second film (Get Hard) in a row to score a sub-30% Rotten Tomatoes rating.
But the actor isn't up for Movie Jail just because of his poorly received 2015 releases. Although the prosecution will give Mr. Ferrell a pass for his early movies (such as A Night at the Roxbury and The Ladies Man), Land of the Lost, Semi-Pro and Bewitched were also panned by critics, and they didn't generate much interest at the box office either. And even though Anchorman 2: The Legend Continues received mostly positive reviews, personally the prosecution thought the sequel was just as disappointing as Dumb and Dumber To. Some people have also grown tired of Mr. Ferrell's shtick, while others have never found him to be that funny to begin with.
Mr. Ferrell probably doesn't deserve a life sentence, but he does need to spend at least a couple of months behind bars for his weaker films, and the prosecution believes the jury will agree that we should lock him up for a bit.
The Defense: The Lego Movie, The Campaign, Casa de Mi Padre, Everything Must Go, Megamind, The Other Guys, Step Brothers, Blades of Glory, Curious George, Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby, Stranger than Fiction, Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy, Elf, Old School, Zoolander
Ladies and gentlemen, Mr. Ferrell may have a few ugly stains on his filmography, but what actor doesn't, especially a comedic one like my client? Although the defense could have done without movies like Semi-Pro and Bewitched, Mr. Ferrell hasn't appeared in that many truly awful films, and it's not like he's only been taking paycheck gigs.
Films like The Other Guys, Step Brothers, Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Boby, and Anchorman work because of Mr. Ferrell's performances in them, and you may not like my client, but you have to respect him for giving it all in every movie, regardless of the size of the role, such as his scene-stealing turns in Starsky & Hutch, Wedding Crashers and the first two Austin Powers flicks. While some of the characters he has played do share similarities, Mr. Ferrell hasn't just been playing "Will Ferrell" either. The defense would like to see him take on more dramatic movies, since he did a great job in Stranger Than Fiction and Everything Must Go, but I understand that comedies are his bread and butter.
Mr. Ferrell's near-classic comedies, his work on Saturday Night Live and his "Funny or Die" video website (Green Team!) should be more than enough to keep him out of the slammer, and the defense has a feeling the jury isn't going to be happy to see that he's being considered for Movie Jail.
IN CLOSING…
Do Mr. Ferrell's good movies outweigh his bad ones, or should we toss him in prison with his Get Hard co-star Kevin Hart? Has he earned a spot in Movie Jail or are you a fan of the funnyman? Is Will Ferrell GUILTY or NOT GUILTY?
*The cases for and against a defendant going to Movie Jail by the author are not necessarily his views and opinions but they are some of the beliefs that one would use to effectively make an argument for both sides. Not quite a devil's advocate but you get the point. Anyway, this is all in fun so don't take it too seriously. We have a separate jail for those people called "Troll Tower" and believe me you do NOT want to go there.
WHAT SAY YOU, GUILTY OR NOT?
LAST WEEK'S VERDICT
It didn't take the jury that long to find Justin Long NOT GUILTY of all charges in last week's trial. Jury members said while Mr. Long doesn't always appear in the best films, he's still a solid working actor, and that we shouldn't hold the Alvin and the Chipmunks movies against him.
PREVIOUS VERDICTS
GUILTY Adam Sandler, Eddie Murphy, Vince Vaughn, Tim Burton, The Farrelly Brothers, Michael Bay, Jessica Alba, Ice Cube, Gerard Butler, Halle Berry, Marlon Wayans, Julia Roberts, M. Night Shyamalan , Katherine Heigl , Cuba Gooding, Jr., Tyler Perry, Cameron Diaz, Kate Hudson, Ashton Kutcher, Happy Madison Productions, Jennifer Lopez, Bruce Willis, Paul W.S. Anderson, Matthew Broderick, Sarah Jessica Parker, Brett Ratner, Rob Cohen, Renee Zellweger, Shia LaBeouf, Renny Harlin, Diane Keaton, McG, Demi Moore, King Joffrey (Game of Thrones Special), David Spade, Spike Lee, Kevin James, Joel Schumacher, Ehren Kruger, Chris Rock, Mark Steven Johnson, Mickey Rourke, Ashley Judd, Uma Thurman, Josh Duhamel, Saw Franchise (Halloween Edition), Zach Braff, Sam Worthington, Melissa McCarthy, The Wachowski Siblings, Kate Bosworth, Garry Marshall, David Goyer, Akiva Goldsman, Avi Arad, Damon Lindelof, Hayden Christensen, Dennis Dugan, Sharon Stone, Jessica Biel, Nick Swardson, Simon Kinberg, Alex & Stephen Kendrick, Eli Roth, Paranormal Activity Franchise (Halloween Edition), Kevin Hart
NOT GUILTY Robert De Niro, Val Kilmer, Nic Cage, John Travolta, Oliver Stone, Ben Stiller, Jim Carrey, Wes Craven, Matthew McConaughey, Robert Rodriguez, Kristen Stewart, Roland Emmerich, Kevin Costner, Sandra Bullock, Hilary Swank, Al Pacino, Keanu Reeves, Kevin Smith, Channing Tatum, Jennifer Aniston, Owen Wilson, Anna Faris, Robin Williams, Charlize Theron, Ray Liotta, Jason Statham, Paul Walker, Will Smith, Salma Hayek, Michael Cera, Johnny Depp, Ryan Reynolds, Milla Jovovich, John Singleton, Jon Voight, Jack Black, Brian De Palma, Jerry Bruckheimer, Nicole Kidman, Justin Timberlake, Freddy Krueger (Halloween Edition), Johnny Knoxville, Orlando Bloom, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Dan Aykroyd, Sylvester Stallone, Gavin Hood, Jason Lee, Jennifer Garner, Carrie-Anne Moss, Kate Beckinsale, John Cusack, Chris Columbus, Clive Owen, Terrence Howard, Andrew Niccol, Drew Barrymore, Steve Martin, Joel Silver, Michelle Rodriguez, Kiefer Sutherland, Dario Argento, Susan Sarandon, Dennis Quaid, Rob Reiner, Gwyneth Paltrow, Mel Gibson, Pierce Brosnan, Roberto Orci & Alex Kurtzman, Ivan Reitman, Stephen Sommers, Shawn Levy, Jai Courtney, Ridley Scott, Peter Jackson, Jamie Foxx, Luc Besson, Jason Reitman, Mila Kunis, Jennifer Connelly, Sienna Miller, Ben Barnes, Simon West, Len Wiseman, Brendan Fraser, Megan Fox, Neal McDonough, Cameron Crowe, Katie Holmes, Elijah Wood, Tarsem Singh, Reese Witherspoon, Burt Reynolds, Ed Helms, Sean Astin, Michael Polish, Kelsey Grammer, Queen Latifah, Mark Wahlberg, Vin Diesel, Barry Levinson, Aaron Eckhart, Luke Wilson, Martin Campbell, Blumhouse Productions, Tim Allen, Justin Long
UPDATES: Robert De Niro, Nicolas Cage and Roland Emmerich, Jim Carrey, Robert Rodriguez and Gerard Butler, Jessica Alba, Julia Roberts and The Farrelly Brothers, Ben Stiller, Tim Burton and Shia LaBeouf, Johnny Depp, Kevin Smith & Chris Rock, Ice Cube, Owen Wilson & Vince Vaughn