This is Movie Jail, a unique maximum security prison that houses some of the worst writers, directors, actors and producers from Hollywood and beyond. Their crimes? The offenses vary from convict to convict but most of these inmates have contributed negatively to the film world to some capacity and his or her misdeeds have covered a long enough period of time that the authorities had to intervene. In each column a defendant is put on trial, arguments are made, and then it is up to YOU, the jury, to decide if the person is guilty or not guilty of crimes against cinema. Their lives are in your hands, dude.
The Defendant
The Case
The Prosecution: Sin City: A Dame to Kill For, Java Heat, Dead in Tombstone, The Courier, Immortals, Passion Play, 13, The Informers, Killshot, Stormbreaker, Domino, Picture Claire, Get Carter, Shades, Point Blank, Thursday, Another 9/12 Weeks, Double Team
Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, Mickey Rourke received rave reviews for The Wreslter (which helped complete his comeback after retiring from boxing), however the prosecution hasn't been impressed with many of his most recent films. Mr. Rourke gave it his all in the Darren Aronofsky flick, and it paid off big time, but lately it seems like he has been coasting.
The prosecution didn't believe Mr. Rourke was going to suddenly become one of those actors who chases awards after receiving so many nominations for his performance in The Wrestler, but we also didn't think he would still be starring in crap below his talent. What the hell is he doing appearing in films like Dead in Tombstone, The Courier and Java Heat? Critics didn't completely hate his Black November, however they didn't love it either. One movie critics did despise though was his Passion Play, and even Mr. Rourke has commented about how it's terrible film. The actor may have chewed scenery like a pro in Immortals and Sin City: A Dame To Kill For, but like most of his other movies as of late, neither film received excellent reviews.
Maybe the reason why Mr. Rourke has trouble finding great roles is because he is still a little rough around the edges. The prosecution might appreciate his no bullshit attitude, but we doubt it has actually helped his career. Mr. Rourke was fantastic in The Expendables, however his behavior was reportedly one of the reasons why he didn't return for the sequels. While the actor has given a lot of credit to his agent for his comeback, the prosecution isn't convinced he's done a great job managing Mr. Rourke's acting career since The Wrestler.
The prosecution still believes Mr. Rourke is a very talented actor and we don't want to lock him up forever, but we think sending Mr. Rourke to Movie Jail will do him some good. A few months in prison should be enough, and we'll even let him bring his dog.
The Defense: The Expendables, Iron Man 2, The Wrestler, Sin City, Once Upon a Time in Mexico, Man on Fire, Spun, The Pledge, Animal Factory, The Rainmaker, Johnny Handsome, A Prayer for the Dying, Angel Heart, Barfly, 9 1/2 Weeks, Year of the Dragon, The Pope of Greenwich Village, Rumble Fish, Diner, Body Heat
Ladies and gentlemen, Mr. Rourke's career may have peaked with The Wrestler, but that doesn't mean we should toss him in Movie Jail. He's still doing outstanding work, even in films that haven't received the best reviews from critics.
A perfect example is The Expendables, which is only at 41% at Rotten Tomatoes, however many had great things to say about my client's performance in the action movie. Although his Immortals is sitting at 35%, it's obvious Mr. Rourke had a blast as the villainous King Hyperion. Sure, some of the magic was gone from his Marv in Sin City: A Dame to Kill For, but it's not his fault Robert Rodriguez and Frank Miller waited nine f*cking years to make the sequel.
Instead of trying to lock my client up, the prosecution should show Mr. Rourke some respect. Maybe he hasn't appeared in the greatest movies lately, but he still has a ton of talent. My client might star in stuff that is below him to help pay the bills, but when Mr. Rourke finds a role or movie that really inspires him, you better watch the f*ck out.
As the prosecution points out, my client will occasionally ruffle a few feathers with his comments, however that's just how he is, and the defense will always love an actor who has no problem speaking the truth, or at least their honest opinion. Has it had a negative impact on his career? More than likely, but probably not nearly as much as the prosecution claims.
If Mr. Rourke was only appearing in direct-to-DVD or VOD stuff, then maybe the prosecution would have a case, but the defense just doesn't think he deserves to go to Movie Jail.
IN CLOSING…
What should we do with the former boxer? Do you think he needs to go to Movie Jail, or have you enjoyed his recent films? Do you believe he's in danger of letting his comeback go to waste, or do you think he's doing just fine with his career? Is Mickey Rourke GUILTY or NOT GUILTY?
COMMENT BELOW WITH YOUR VERDICT!
*The cases for and against a defendant going to Movie Jail by the author are not necessarily his views and opinions but they are some of the beliefs that one would use to effectively make an argument for both sides. Not quite a devil's advocate but you get the point. Anyways, this is all in fun so don't take it too seriously. We have a separate jail for those people called "Troll Tower" and believe me you do NOT want to go there.
WHAT SAY YOU, GUILTY OR NOT?
LAST WEEK'S VERDICT
Most of the jury was completely against the idea of Mel Gibson being considered for Movie Jail in last week's trial, and the actor has been found NOT GUILTY of all charges. Jury members said they thought it was insane Mr. Gibson was up for prison, and chewed the prosecution a new one for wanting to put him behind bars. They also said they can't wait for Mr. Gibson to direct another movie, and still think he's a fantastic actor.
PREVIOUS VERDICTS
GUILTY Adam Sandler, Eddie Murphy, Vince Vaughn, Tim Burton, The Farrelly Brothers, Michael Bay, Jessica Alba, Ice Cube, Gerard Butler, Halle Berry, Marlon Wayans, Julia Roberts, M. Night Shyamalan , Katherine Heigl , Cuba Gooding, Jr., Tyler Perry, Cameron Diaz, Kate Hudson, Ashton Kutcher, Happy Madison Productions, Jennifer Lopez, Bruce Willis, Paul W.S. Anderson, Matthew Broderick, Sarah Jessica Parker, Brett Ratner, Rob Cohen, Renee Zellweger, Shia LaBeouf, Renny Harlin, Diane Keaton, McG, Demi Moore, King Joffrey (Game of Thrones Special), David Spade, Spike Lee, Kevin James, Joel Schumacher, Ehren Kruger, Chris Rock, Mark Steven Johnson
NOT GUILTY Robert De Niro, Val Kilmer, Nic Cage, John Travolta, Oliver Stone, Ben Stiller, Jim Carrey, Wes Craven, Matthew McConaughey, Robert Rodriguez, Kristen Stewart, Roland Emmerich, Kevin Costner, Sandra Bullock, Hilary Swank, Al Pacino, Keanu Reeves, Kevin Smith, Channing Tatum, Jennifer Aniston, Owen Wilson, Anna Faris, Robin Williams, Charlize Theron, Ray Liotta, Jason Statham, Paul Walker, Will Smith, Salma Hayek, Michael Cera, Johnny Depp, Ryan Reynolds, Milla Jovovich, John Singleton, Jon Voight, Jack Black, Brian De Palma, Jerry Bruckheimer, Nicole Kidman, Justin Timberlake, Freddy Krueger (Halloween Special), Johnny Knoxville, Orlando Bloom, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Dan Aykroyd, Sylvester Stallone, Gavin Hood, Jason Lee, Jennifer Garner, Carrie-Anne Moss, Kate Beckinsale, John Cusack, Chris Columbus, Clive Owen, Terrence Howard, Andrew Niccol, Drew Barrymore, Steve Martin, Joel Silver, Michelle Rodriguez, Kiefer Sutherland, Dario Argento, Susan Sarandon, Dennis Quaid, Rob Reiner, Gwyneth Paltrow, Mel Gibson