Yesterday my second cousin’s mistress was walking through Queens and told me that she saw that “black guy” from that “Tina Fey Show” dressed as a “giant cell phone” while riding a “bicycle” and being “chased” by a “pit bull”. I explained to her that his name was Tracy Morgan and that’s the kind of stuff he does on his days off. Then my second cousin’s dentist’s assistant told me that it was actually Morgan filming a scene for Kevin Smith’s upcoming A COUPLE OF DICKS. It also stars Bruce Willis, Sean William Scott, Adam Brody and Kevin Pollak and is about two cops who track down a stolen baseball card, rescue a Mexican beauty and deal with gangsters and laundered drug money. I sighed, and went to the water park.