Top 10 Ridiculous Sports Moments in Movies

1. Where’s the Flag? – THE LAST BOYSCOUT

I’m actually surprised we haven’t seen this happen yet with some of the nut jobs in the NFL. Think about it, if you need one more touchdown to get a million dollar bonus from the team AND you’re slamming your face into a cocaine-steroid cocktail before every game, what are the chances you don’t have a gun tucked into your jock?

2. Fireworks – THE NATURAL

If this really happened it would be the scariest shit ever. “Here’s the pitch…. OH, he hit it a mile! Way back…. and…. GONE! Into the light-tower! Oh my….. now it seems the lights are exploding. OH MY GOD, there’s thousands of fireballs and shards of glass raining down on the right field bleachers! There is utter chaos as fans are literally igniting in their seats and then running onto the field…. OH! Some poor woman just exploded on the warning track!”

That would be awesome.

3. The Triple Lindy – BACK TO SCHOOL

This is, like, the fourth Ten Spot this scene has shown up on. Apparently, I really love this shit. And why not? Yes, I know it’s supposed to be funny but what makes it ridiculous is the fact that every other dive is the film is legit and then Melon whips out something no human could ever pull off. I did it it once though.

4. Buzzer Beater – ESCAPE FROM L.A.

Good Lord, is this ever terrible. I’ve seen disabled infants with more basketball skills than Snake Plissken. And, yet, there he is knocking down jumpers and heaving full court shots to save his life. The worst part is that it seems like he’s not even trying, as if he runs through this drill every morning after breakfast. Worst. Death trap. Ever.

5. The Hanson’s First shift – SLAP SHOT

It would be hard to convince me this isn’t the greatest three minute sequence of any sports film ever made. I must have watched that slap shot moment above a dozen times while getting those caps and laughed harder every viewing.

6. Thunderlips – ROCKY III

Can you imagine if they tried this shit in the real world? Tonight in Las Vegas – WBO Welterweight World Champion, Manny Pacquiao takes on The Undertaker! The second The dead Man threw The Pac-Man out of the ring you could actually hear the WWE fold all operations and the passing of Vince MacMahon.

7. Chip’s Monster Dunk – THE CABLE GUY

There were a few movie dunks I could have included here. Joe Pesci in THE SUPER and Ed Norton in AMERICAN HISTORY X are both just as ridiculous as this but I decided to go with Chip’s thunderous slam because of the backboard shatter. Jim Carrey could strap a rhino on his back and smack the glass with a porcelain hammer and that shit still wouldn’t even crack.

8. F*ck a crane, yo. – THE KARATE KID

At what point during the film does Dre-son learn the final move he unleashes on Cheng? The original saw Daniel working on the Crane for hours, striving for perfection and waiting for the perfect moment to try it out. Dre gets beat into a corner and decides, what the hell, I might as well whip out that back-flip, triple twist, dropkick to the back of the head I saw some kung-fu zen master perform in my dreams.

9. Be the Ball – KINGPIN

My dad doesn’t appreciate this foolishness. There’s no way Munson would be allowed to count that strike considering his prosthetic hand was still attached to the ball. “This is a league sanctioned tournament for fucks sake!” Relax, Dad, it’s bowling.

10. Bump. Set. Cruise. – TOP GUN

Fact: Tom Cruise is 4’3″. And he’s wearing jeans. Are we really supposed to believe his crazy ups are springing him off the sand for some of these monster spikes he’s throwing down? There’s no way that net is regulation, unless they’re playing on the beach badminton court.

Honorable Mention: Strike? – THE NAKED GUN

It just so happens the most ridiculous sports scene in the history of film is also the funniest. And while it doesn’t really fit it with the tone of the rest of these movies (since it’s supposed to be funny) I thought it was the right thing to do in honor of the passing of Leslie Nielsen and to show the rest of this list how it’s supposed to be done.