Last Updated on August 3, 2021
1. Going Down – DRIVE
An atmospheric onslaught of romance, tension, and brutal violence, perfectly lit, perfectly scored, and perfectly offsetting. In a word – PERFECT.
2. Look Away – BRIDESMAIDS
I didn’t even come close to laughing this hard during any other film this year. Completely blinded with tears throughout the whole sequence. That’s what happens when you mix some shit jokes into your chick flick. Take note.
3. Nailed the Dismount – FINAL DESTINATION 5
This one scene embodies everything that was ever good about the FINAL DESTINATION franchise. Tension, mystery, fear, blood, and shock value. Nothing made me jump like the climax of this routine.
4. Run, Moses, Run – ATTACK THE BLOCK
What could have been a sloppy shaky-cam sequence turned out to be one of the best action sequences of the year as Moses makes his run from apartment to apartment in this slow-motion masterpiece.
5. Go F*ck Yourselves – X-MEN: FIRST CLASS
The best cameo ever? Maybe, but there’s no doubt it was one of the highlights of this year. Great movie. Great line. Great sideburns.
6. Deceptiworm – TRANSFORMERS: DARK OF THE MOON
If this film was an hour and a half of this crazy bastard destroying Chicago it would be one of the greatest achievements in film and my inner child would have passed away with delightful orgasmic convulsions. It wasn’t. Stupid people talk stupid stuff.
7. Production Value – SUPER 8
A relentless attack on your senses that leaves you gripping your seat and ducking your head. And then the alien shows up. A great scene kicked off by some fantastic acting by the kids. I shot a scene like this once and a bird flew into frame and shat on my ear. It was awesome.
8. The Safe Heist – FAST FIVE
By the time we got to this scene it didn’t matter how ridiculous the rest of the movie was. Show me the giant safe smash into more shit and I’ll forgive the stupid amount of dialogue you gave Tyrese. He’s so crazy! Shut up.
9. Portman’s Ass – YOUR HIGHNESS
In another bland comedy with more than enough missed opportunities, Natalie Portman delivered the hottest 5 seconds of cinema of the year. Thongs do this woman well. Let’s try pasties next time.
10. When Worlds Collide – MELANCHOLIA
The first half of this film did nothing for me. The second half more than made up for it, highlighted by the final scene in which we finally get to see the other planet. Up close.
Honorable Mention: Say What? – RISE OF THE PLANET OF THE APES
It wasn’t one of the more exciting scenes in the film and happened to be a moment we all knew was coming sooner or later but it still sparked a couple goosebumps when Caesar talked his first bit of shit.
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