Last Updated on August 3, 2021
3- Long Kiss Goodnight
Renny Harlin’s The Long Kiss Goodnight written by Shane Black and starring Geena Davis and Samuel L. Jackson is probably my favorite Christmas action film for 3 reasons. 1- It’s set during Christmas. 2- There’s snow. 3- It’s a funny, gory, vulgar and action packed good time! Harlin (and Black) at his best!
1- Gremlins
Gremlins takes the viewer by the hand and guides him/her through so many different vibes that at least one of them is sure to connect and highly please. The cute moments were sweet, the scary moments were frightening and the funny moments were knee slapping. Personally, it always charms me to a ludicrous degree, no matter how many times I see it. Forget the gifts, forget the family gatherings and the X-Mas tree, just open up a brew, watch Gremlins and discover what X-Mas should be all about. DECK THE HALLS WITH GREMLINS OF JOLLY!
2- The Nativity Story
There are a lot of movies out there about Christ’s ministry and his passing on the cross, but not many are dedicated solely to his birth (which Christmas celebrates). Out of the ones that I have seen Catherine Hardwicke’s The Nativity Story has to be my favorite and I now watch it every Christmas. It sports a stellar cast (Keisha Castle-Hughes and Oscar Isaac were solid as Mary and Joseph), sturdy production values and has lots of heart. If your Christmas usually has a spiritual streak that goes further than getting hammered, a fat dude in a red suit and giving/getting gifts, I recommend this one!
4- National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation
Christmas Vacation has been a staple in my family since it came out in 1989. I watched with them as a kid and now as a “grown up”, I still tap it every Christmas with loved ones. Why? In short: it’s Holiday themed and it still is very f*cking funny. So many classic scenes in that film! Clark Griswold’s drunken rant, the flying squirrel bit, the sled scene, the cat getting his dues, Cousin Eddy’s antics… and of course Chevy Chase at his best! Timeless!
7- Die Hard/Die Hard 2
Yeah I know I’m cheating by including two films in one entry but every Christmas it depends on my mood as to which Die Hard I yearn for. On one end Die Hard is set during Christmas time, and of course has a handful of Christmas related moments but just like Lethal Weapon there’s no f-ing snow! So it doesn’t feel 100% “Christmassy” for this East Coast boy. Die Hard 2 on the other hand – truckload of snow and much like the first one, tight pace, Bruce Willis doing his thing 100% and action scenes galore to boot! It’s a toss up!
5- Mystery Alaska
This story about The New York Rangers versus a bunch of lowly Alaskans always gets me! It’s a witty, uplifting and board smashing ride! I watch this movie every Christmas. There’s just something about it that makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside. Is it the colorful characters, the poignant underdog story, the Xmas setting, the striking snowy scenery, the raunchy humor or the clever dialogue? Yup it’s all of it and then some!
9- Krampus
Krampus was lots of fun! As much as it was funny and earnest, it also pulled off being creepy. A tricky juggling act, one that was achieved with gusto here! The flick had a stellar cast, all kinds of morose creativity and top-notch production/creature designs. It should be stabbed that the use of practical effects was esteemed by this jerk and Krampus himself made for quite the iconic figure. I was in awe when he was fully revealed.
6- Black Christmas
Black Christmas was an all around well rounded horror flick that hit notes most fear entries out there failed at. If you haven’t experienced this tasty cup of acid yet, stop choking that Reindeer and go get it this second. If you can get past some of its now familiar “slasher” conventions, you will be treated to a superior, unapologetic and nasty little bastard that’s sure to awake your dormant X-Mas spirit.
8- A Christmas Carol (1999)
I’ve seen countless incarnations of Charles Dickens classic novel A Christmas Carol. I grew up on the George C Scott version but now of late the 1999 made-for-television film is probably my fav version. Why? Well for one the flick looked fantastic, the money was on the screen and the mood/sets were fairly bleak for a Christmas movie. But the big highlight was having the great Patrick Stewart play Ebenezer Scrooge. What a casting stroke of genius! The lad owned that movie like everything else that he touches.
10- Scrooged
Bill Murray is at his sarcastic/a-hole and funniest best in this 80’s update of Dickens A Christmas Carol which played out as a VERY somber comedy, one with all kinds of horror inspired imagery tagged to its ass. Wait till you see what the Ghost of Christmas Future’s has locked in his rib cage. Warped stuff!
HONORABLE MENTION: Lethal Weapon
I love Lethal Weapon. It’s probably in my Top 5 action films of all time but for some reason that only my shrink fully understands, I rarely watch it at Christmas (maybe once every 3-4 years or so), even though it is set during the Holidays. Not sure why! Is it the lack of snow (cocaine aside)? Maybe! All that to say I’m giving it a mention cause I love the shit out of the movie and I will tap it this year for sure, but usually, it’s not the norm during my Xmas.
HONORABLE MENTION 2: Cobra
Anybody that knows me well is aware that Stallone’s COBRA is one of my favorite actions film of all time. The brutality, the macho-ness, the slasher elements, the priceless one liners, the hot car, the axe clinging villains… and I can go on and on! One thing that I had failed to register until recently is that COBRA is set during the Holidays. How the bleep did I miss that for all them years!!!??? All that to stab; I just added the flick to my “watch this year at X-Mas” pile! Now can we get that director’s cut please??????!!! Thanks!
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