Linds derails project

Lindsay Lohan just can’t catch a break. Even though she’s vowed to maintain her sobriety, going so far as to voluntarily accessorizing her alcohol-free club-hopping with a booze-detecting ankle bracelet, Hollywood is still treating her like some “party girl” pariah and not the Serious Actress she yearns to be. According to Page Six, bond companies refusing to insure the upcoming drama POOR THINGS, in which she was to star alongside Shirley MaClaine, has essentially killed the project. They apparently had concerns that Linds’ notorious party antics would interfere with the film’s production. Which is an egregious concern because even if Linds wasn’t booze-free, the only possible outcomes of her insatiable drinking would be routine tardiness, one or twelve days where she’d go missing, on-set intoxication and possible vomiting and possibly burning down a building or six. And, let’s be honest, what movie set doesn’t have those minor concerns?