Last Updated on November 12, 2024

You know how sometimes certain stories just don’t need to be adapted? Some things are better left to the imagination, where the absurd or the grotesque can play out without limitations. I’m sure you can rattle off a few examples right now. Go ahead. We’ll wait. There’s a delicate balance when it comes to adaptations. It’s not just about bringing the story to life—it’s about keeping its essence intact. And while The Body Politic and Chattery Teeth both have their strengths, some things just work better on paper. Mick Garris definitely had opinions about how this particular adaptation played out, especially after the order got flipped for the release. One of these stories works just fine. The other? Well, you’ll see. Quicksilver Highway having just two stories feels a little odd, until you find out they were hoping it would spin off into a series. Spoiler: it didn’t.

John McTiernan—yes, the John McTiernan of Die Hard and Predator—wanted to direct a horror anthology based on folk tales and ghost stories. Except, McTiernan wouldn’t be directing or writing it. Enter Mick Garris, approached by CAA with the request to write a one-hour pilot for McTiernan’s idea. Garris, being Garris, wasn’t exactly thrilled by the concept, and instead pitched adapting stories from Stephen King and Clive Barker. Already familiar with the Kingverse, Garris immediately grabbed Chattery Teeth. Then, after combing through Barker’s catalog of twisted delights—his “library of erotic grotesqueries,” if you will—Garris landed on The Body Politic. Barker hadn’t thought of it for film, but gave the thumbs up. ABC initially flirted with the idea of making it a series, but the head exec at the time turned it down. That’s when Garris and crew took the project over to Fox, who loved the concept but wanted a two-hour movie instead. And that’s how Quicksilver Highway was born.

Christopher Lloyd stepped into the role of Aaron Quicksilver, our wandering narrator, traveling the country to share his strange tales with unsuspecting folks. Garris initially wasn’t sold on Lloyd for the part—he pictured Quicksilver as more seductive, more mysterious. But Lloyd, being the national treasure that he is, quickly proved why he was the perfect fit, bringing his own brand of creepy quirkiness to the character. Honestly, do we really need a seductive, mysterious type for this? Lloyd’s performance makes Quicksilver more fun to watch, and his quirky edge keeps the journey way more interesting. Quicksilver typically claims that his stories don’t come with a purpose or moral. According to him, he’s just sharing tales to find an audience—nothing more, nothing less.

Breakdown:

Part One: Our first tale, The Body Politic, centers on a plastic surgeon, played by Matt Frewer, who’s used to being in complete control—until his own hands have other plans and decide to stage a rebellion. This one opens with Frewer as a pickpocket on the Santa Monica Pier. He stumbles into a mysterious tent filled with oddities. Christopher Lloyd, our eccentric narrator and guide, plays Aaron Quicksilver. At one point, he tells the pickpocket—also played by Matt Frewer, with his usual snark—about the Hand of Glory, which is, as Quicksilver casually mentions, a real hand. The pickpocket is intrigued, but Quicksilver reminds him how little we consider what we’d do without our hands—until we no longer have them.

Then we dive into the telling of the story itself. Charlie, also played by Frewer, is a successful plastic surgeon who agrees to perform surgery on a woman who is practically melting. During the operation, he fumbles the scalpel not once, but twice—creating a hilarious moment that’s made even more amusing by the fact that Clive Barker himself makes a cameo in the scene.

On his way home, Charlie starts swerving dangerously, realizing something is off when he asks his hands, “Do you guys not love me anymore?” His loving wife, Ellen played by Cynthia Garris, tries to soothe him with a candlelit bath and a nightcap. But while Charlie sleeps, his hands start chattering away, plotting their rebellion and raising an army. Ellen catches this bizarre hand choreography and watches in disturbed fascination.

Charlie’s therapist assures him that he’s in control, despite Charlie’s growing paranoia about his hands. But as the hands’ plan unfolds, Ellen’s last words are a heartfelt “I love you,” right before they choke her. Charlie’s desperate plea to stop comes too late—his hands have already won. In a final act of defiance, Charlie calls his therapist with his nose, attempting to explain that his hands have taken full control. Meanwhile, the hands are reveling in their victory. Charlie hacks off one of his hands with a butcher knife, and it’s off to raise their army.

The next 15 minutes are a chaotic spree of murder and mayhem, a grim version of Thing’s Big Day Out. Charlie gathers all the hands on a rooftop, convinces them he’s their new leader, and urges them to embrace freedom from the tyranny of the body. In a dramatic finale, he leaps to his death, taking all the loose hands with him. As the credits roll, you might chuckle at the thought of Clive Barker watching from the sidelines, probably wondering if he should start keeping an eye on his own hands.

Thoughts & Faves: Barker’s writing in The Body Politic is so vividly immersive that it almost reads like poetry, even when tackling something as outlandishly gruesome as rebellious hands. His knack for crafting beautifully horrifying narratives is part of what sets his work apart, allowing him to build atmosphere and dread that the screen often struggles to match.

Matt Frewer proves once again why he’s not only a master of his craft but a staple in the horror genre. What I love is that he’s always all in on whatever role he’s taking. Here Frewer is having to treat his hands as a separate entity, functioning in their own realm. Also, has anyone noticed how charismatic he is? Am I alone here? Frewer didn’t even need to audition. Garris pretty much said, “I know you’re game for a wild story about rebellious hands.”

I know I mentioned Barker’s cameo, but John Landis also appears as a surgical assistant. Do whatever you want with that.

I’m sure you all easily picked out that the Addams Family and Idle Hands work is in full effect here. Christopher Hart is a hand wizard. I had other jokes here but backed out. Idle Hands is also a story of hands gone rouge but that hand isn’t trying to start a rebellion.

I love how distressed the nurse is when she’s in the room with Charlie and his therapist. The nurse’s reaction was so overly emotional, you’d think she was auditioning for a soap opera. I mean, sure, it’s shocking that some guy’s hands are plotting a murder spree, but she was acting like she just found out they were canceling her favorite tv show. I almost expected her to faint onto a conveniently placed couch.

The moment with the nurse at the end, cutting off her own nose with a pair of giant scissors, is probably the most disturbing part—though the wiggling kind of ruins the suspense and gives away what’s coming.

Part Two: The next story, Chattery Teeth, kicks off with a newlywed couple—pregnant bride and all—stranded on an empty highway in the middle of nowhere. Kerry, played by Raphael Sbarge wanders off to find a rest stop, leaving his pregnant bride behind, and—of course—Quicksilver shows up to offer her some food while she waits. He invites her into his camper, which, much like the TARDIS, is bigger on the inside—except instead of a control room, it’s hiding a Victorian home with a proper dining room. Quicksilver, in his usual mysterious way, starts talking about collecting stories and oddities from the dark heart of America. “Without darkness, there can be no light,” he tells her, which, understandably, leaves Missy feeling a bit uneasy. As her teeth begin to chatter from the cold, he hands her a blanket and begins telling her about another set of chattering teeth…

Bill, also Sbarge, is a salesman who should’ve been home ages ago, but that’s the job. While stopping for gas, he picks up a pair of toy chattering teeth as a peace offering for his kid, not realizing those teeth will eventually come to his aid. Bill runs into a hitchhiker, aptly named Bryan Adams, played by Silas Weir Mitchell—who I would definitely not give a ride to, because who does that anymore? But considering there’s a pretty nasty storm, he decides to go against his better instincts. Also, you can’t trust Bryan Adams because he doesn’t know shit about the Summer of ’69—he was like 9.

During their time together, Bill figures out soon enough that Bryan Adams is full of crap.The tension builds, and things take a turn when Bryan pulls a knife on Bill. But Bill’s not going down without a fight; he out-crazies Bryan, threatening to flip the van and promising he’ll survive while Bryan won’t. He makes good on that threat when a semi comes barreling toward them, and Bill swerves, flipping the van.

It’s not over yet. When they come to, Bill realizes he’s stuck, trapped by his seatbelt, while Bryan is loving the role reversal. Bryan continues to threaten Bill, who’s desperately wishing to escape. That’s when Bryan finds the chattery teeth in the car and starts playing with them, getting them uncomfortably close to his face. You know it’s going to get ugly soon. Suddenly, the teeth snap down on Bryan—and they don’t stop. Bill, terrified, braces for what’s next, but the teeth have no ill will toward him. They’re content with Bryan as their sacrifice, dragging him off into the desert.

Almost a year later, Bill’s back on the road, and of course, he ends up at the same gas station. And there they are—the teeth—waiting for him, like they were always meant to be together.

Thoughts & Faves: Why didn’t we start with this one?

Veronica Cartwright, Lambert, who is in too many things to name but is also a friend of Horror, is so delightfully charming here as Myra. I’d like to mention for the record that she has one of the best screams out there.

I was also really impressed by the design of the chattery teeth toy. It’s over exaggerated and massive which is not what I expected going into it. It’s also mildly hilarious that the teeth are just like, “I got this bro” and just takes care of it. What if we had a whole Chattery teeth vigilante series?

Gotta love King’s death by inanimate objects. You have to wonder if he has anxiety walking through grocery stores. “The canned peas might explode and the brooms may come to life!” The most benign thing is always plotting against you: trucks, cars, teeth, soda machines… Maybe one day he’ll just snap after an interaction with his coffee maker. I often wonder if the stove has a beef with me.

I love the dynamic between Sbarge and Mitchell. Sbarge channels a toned-down D-Fens from Falling Down, while Mitchell gives off a Harry-from-Home Alone energy—only this time, he’s genuinely intimidating.

The Aftermath: The movie premiered on Fox as promised, but it missed the mark. No shocker—no green light for more “moviesodes.” This was it—one and done. By the time it aired, Fox execs were too busy chasing sports ratings and sitcom laugh tracks, leaving Quicksilver Highway to quietly fade from memory. This didn’t slow down the frequent King collaborator one bit. He went on to direct some episodes of The Shining miniseries, Riding the Bullet, Masters of Horror (which we’ve previously discussed), and started his own podcast, Post Mortem. Maybe the timing wasn’t right, or maybe it didn’t get the marketing push it deserved. As someone who appreciates anthologies—and maybe I’m a bit biased—there’s always a place for stories like this. They just need the right moment, the right audience, and maybe a little more love from those in charge. I believe Garris had a bittersweet moment over it all. He loved both stories, and Lloyd’s take on Aaron Quicksilver had completely won him over.

So what did we learn from this? Always keep your hands happy, and maybe think twice before buying wind-up toys. Life lessons, courtesy of Clive Barker and Stephen King.

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