With the fourth RESIDENT EVIL flick dropping on us, I got to thinking about the best part of the uneven series of movies. For my money it’s easily watching Alice kick all manner of ass because hot chicks are great, but hot chicks that know how to take care of themselves are just flat out of this world.
So this week we’ll look at the ladies who lay down the law like a pissed off Catholic school nun, and look anywhere from pretty good to downright amazing while they do it. These aren’t chicks you trifle with. These are women you marry. If they will have you. Which they won’t.
So let’s get right to the list, and since I know you all have some opinions to share here, spit those bullets. Preferably with links, y’know!
WARNING – ESCARE ESTROGEN BELOW!
10. Sidney Prescott, SCREAM
The lack of enthusiasm for the fourth installment in the SCREAM series seems like a good indicator of how played out the franchise feels now, but there’s no denying how fresh it felt when the original came out. Especially watching our heroine Sidney fight back hard against Ghostface. This was no damsel in distress. This was a hellcat who was ready to fight for survival, even after giving up her V-card.
9. Eli, LET THE RIGHT ONE IN
Buy the LET THE RIGHT ONE IN DVD here
Despite the fact that Eli is simultaneously too young and too old to date, she is about as amazing a chick as a young boy could find. Sweet, pretty, mysterious, and ready to unleash hell on anyone who f*cks with her few friends. Besides, how many women do you know that are willing to bleed from the face for you? Not many I hope, but there’s something deeply touching about Eli’s willingness to do anything for Oskar.
8. Sarah, THE DESCENT
Sure Juno is the obvious Alpha Babe on this expedition, but she’s also a total douchebag which takes away from her appeal. Sarah on the other hand. Well she starts off as the soft-spoken, put upon cuckold in the group, but ends up finding her inner warrior in a big way. When she ultimately takes her revenge on the woman who banged her husband it is a decision that is cold and ruthless. She has become a woman who is not to be f*cked with.
7. Clarice Starling, THE SILENCE OF THE LAMBS
Buy THE SILENCE OF THE LAMBS DVD here
How’d you like to go toe to toe with the scariest human predator on the planet, and then get jizzed on by a crazy person? Oh, and did I mention that neither of these gents is the guy you’re actually trying to catch? Just another day in the life of our intrepid FBI investigator. The fact that she doesn’t collapse in a heap of despair after her first day on the Buffalo Bill case is a testament to her strength. And not for nothing, Foster has never looked better.
6. Cherry Darling, PLANET TERROR
Buy the PLANET TERROR DVD here
Machine gun leg? Yes, please. And when you attach it to the gorgeous Rose McGowan with hardly any clothes on the deal just gets better. She spins, she jumps, she mows down fields of zombies with her pure badass self. It’d be slightly cooler if she had armed herself instead of getting it as a present from her boyfriend, but still, once equipped she got down to business.
STAY TUNED FOR PART 2!