Last Updated on July 23, 2021
What’s not to love about a woman flexing her brawn onscreen? In an industry overly dominated by men – male writers, male directors, producers, execs, male actors who enjoy vastly arrayed parts to play – it’s always refreshing to see the inverse. It’s even better when a woman is bestowed a sense of empowerment, manifested through a sense of unbridled grit and toughness. Zack Snyder seems to feel this way too, since after making the priapic 300, he has flipped the script entirely and placed the power in the hands of his six gorgeous female actresses in SUCKER PUNCH. With that in mind, and I know our man Matt Withers touched on his version months ago, we thought it’d be fun to offer a sincere salute to some of the most ass-kicking genre hotties seen onscreen in recent memory. Sound good? Get your mops and rubber gloves handy, it’s gonna get messy!
WARNING: MINOR TO MAJOR SPOILERS BELOW!
#10. BUFFY – BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER (1992)
Buy BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER on DVD here
Although the TV series it spawned has proven far more popular over the years, there’s only one original. Besides, Kristy Swanson’s titular valley girl cum vampire slayer is flat out finer than Sarah Michelle Gellar (sorry Chelle). And while we would have liked to see what Buffy could have done if Joss Whedon’s original script was left intact, instead of being “lightened,” (including a sequence where Buffy would have burned down the school gym during the climactic school dance), Buffy and her airy colloquialisms and penchant for bloodletting are good enough to award a tip of the cap. After-all, doing away with a Bohemian Pee-Wee Herman and foully mustachioed Rutger Hauer has to be worth something, right? Sure she’s shacks up with Dylan in Clooney bowl-cut, but we’re willing to overlook that for our purposes here. She catches flying knives, drives stakes through ghoulish hearts with her feet, and torments a young Hillary Swank in her screen debut.
#9. JESSICA YANG – SUPERCOP 2 (1993)
If for no other reason than to avoid being slammed for provincial nationalism, we’d be remiss if a little love didn’t get cast to some foreign actresses. And while you can consider this more of a celebration of the woman’s entire oeuvre, Michelle Yeoh’s (formerly Michelle Khan) work in SUPERCOP 2 is pretty f*ckin’ badass. Sure we could have gone with Maggie Cheung just as easily (see IRMA VEP yo, yes the anagram of which spells VAMPIRE), but with Yeoh’s ability to go toe-to-toe with both Jackie Chan and Jet Li (TAI CHI MASTER), she earns our spotlight of adulation a tad more. Even as she nears fifty years old, the stunning Malaysian still headlines action flicks (REIGNS OF ASSASSINS), having worked with such filmmaking talents as Ang Lee, Luc Besson, Stanley Tong, David Chung, Danny Boyle, not to mention the crossover work in such populist fare as TOMORROW NEVER DIES, THE MUMMY 2, KUNG FU PANDA 2, etc. etc. Yup, Michelle Yeoh is one sexy ass import we’re glad to claim as our own!
#8. THE GIRLS – DEATH PROOF (2007)
Even among our own ranks, I know Tarantino’s DEATH PROOF is probably the most polarizing of all his work heretofore – with our very own Arrow and E.Dub disliking it quite a bit, and Ammon, Jared and myself diggin’ the hell out of it – but there’s really no refuting how badass the second threesome of hotties ends up being in the films climax. I mean, when you can reduce Snake Plissken to piss-ant rubble of tears, wailing and moaning for his own life, you gotta be doing something right. Yes the movie is an exercise in dopey dialogue up to that point, but let’s not get it twisted: when stuntwoman Zoe Bell straps herself to the hood of a 1970 Dodge Challenger and has a joyride interrupted by Russell’s perverted sadist, the consequences are nothing short of awesome! And while I wish the gorgeous Mary Elizabeth Winstead joined Rosario Dawson and Traci Thoms, as it stands, the comeuppance the power trio serves, what with their lead pipe cruelty and merciless pugilism, Russell gets rag-dolled worse than Rihanna in a Chris Brown confrontation!
#7. LARA CROFT – TOMB RAIDER (2001)
Sure, perennial looker Angelina Jolie has displayed her acumen to kill a mofo in flicks like MR. & MRS. SMITH, WANTED, SALT, etc., it’s her work as Lara Croft in two videogame adaptations, LARA CROFT: TOMB RAIDER and TOMB RAIDER: CRADLE OF LIFE that we’ve decided to highlight. What, you thought we were going with CYBORG 2? HACKERS? Not quite. Nope, the TOMB RAIDER flicks are most apposite genre wise, and while I’m certainly no gamer, one game I did tackle a time or two in my heyday was that of Lara Croft and her escapades across various ruins and underworld terror. Obviously, the film adaptations are no works of art, but Jolie, in those short shorts and tight bodysuit, is clearly at the height of her hotness (at age 26 and 28, respectively). And as far as her butt whooping skills are concerned here, she runs the gamut: hand to hand combat, firepower against robotic monsters and the like, pit and pratfalls to overcome, etc., etc. Sure it’s derivative (INDIANA JONES) and diversionary, but Jolie’s presence is a definite force to be reckoned with!
#6. BEATRIX KIDDO – KILL BILL (2003)
Buy KILL BILL Vol. 1 on DVD here
Buy KILL BILL Vol. 2 on DVD here
Quentin loves his leading ladies, and it’s never been more apparent than the role he gave Uma Thurman in KILL BILL. Utterly badass, The Bride’s redemptive arc is one to behold. Left for dead and told her pregnant child was terminated, she endures multiple levels of violent showdown, some of which mano y mano, some of which mano y many. Yet through all the exorbitant, cartoonish martial arts and J-horror gore, Uma grounds her performance in enough of a reality that we actually care for her. We care for her to not only seek retribution, but to get her child back as well. Not to mention all of her own stunt-work and sword-handling Uma performed in the flick, going fist-to-fist with the likes of Sonny Chiba, Gordon Liu, Chiaki Kuriyama and David Carradine (not to mention the slew of non-pros). And if you want body count, look no further than The Bride’s Showdown at House Of Blue Leaves, where she lets more blood than an aggregate menstrual cycle of a small all girls school. Now that’s a badass bitch!
#5. Nikita – LA FEMME NIKITA (1990)
Buy LA FEMME NIKITA on DVD here
Appropriated in at least two admirable remakes (POINT OF NO RETURN in 1993 and FEMME FATAL in 2002), Luc Besson’s 1990 slick action romp LA FEMME NIKITA still holds up as not only a solid piece of entertainment, but in many ways a forerunner of the paradigm feted on this here compilation. Sleek, sexy and undeniably deadly, Anne Parillaud’s convict-turned-assassin exudes everything you’d want in a badass anti-heroine. In other words, the same girl you desperately wanna cuddle with in one scene is the same broad you’d run for your life from in the next; and it’s the counterbalance of give and pull, of attraction and repellence that makes her so damn interesting to watch. Seriously, how can one person be so daintily adorable one moment and flat out terrifying in the next? Put more directly, I’d marry any smokin’ French woman able to rock a .357 Magnum and a silenced Steyr AUG assault rifle. And this comes from anti-gun pacifist. Yup, that’s how much I love me some Nikita!
#4. Selene – UNDERWORLD (2003)
While Rhona Mitra did a passable enough job replacing Kate Beckinsale in UNDERWORLD: RISE OF THE LYCANS, there’s only goddamn Selene. Thankfully the lovely lady is making a return in the 4rth installment, despite its distasteful subtitle UNDERWORLD: NEW DAWN. Honestly though, what’s not to love about a first rate looker decked in skintight black leather, one who, while falling in love with one in her adversarial specie, is capable of showing ultimate brute force in her quest to quell a werewolf onslaught? Not much, right? And while the Shakespearean bout of unrequited love between werewolf and vampire has been taken to embarrassing extremes in the TWILIGHT franchise, I’m confident Selene could slash and slay the entire cast of all three of those abominable movies, Lautner’s abs included. That’s how badass Selene is. Equipped with an arsenal John Matrix would blush at, Selene uses gunfire and martial artistry to dispatch any ghoulish sumbitch who threatens her path. This is certainly one lady you don’t wanna fuck with (unless in the bedroom, of course!)
#3. Alice – RESIDENT EVIL (2002)
With the lethal combination of unparalleled sexiness, bubbly charisma, staying power, and the ability to disembowel any cretin that dare cross her path, Milla Jovovich’s turns as Alice in the RESIDENT EVIL films is exactly the kind of ass-kicking hottie we’d all love to bring home to mom. No doubt about it. In fact, if her portrayals weren’t as recent, done so in a subsequently waning quality of movies, she may be awarded the number one spot. As it stands, the lovely looker is brandishing the bronze medal. Even when Milla’s hubby Paul W.S. Anderson (and other directors) surrounds her with the likes of Michelle Rodriguez, Ali Larter and Sienna Guillory, none of them can really hold a candle to the combustible flame Alice emits at all times. This is her franchise, through and through. Zombies, monsters, evil corporations…no matter, when Alice laces up the sexy combat boots, straps on an Uzi or two and flexes her steel, it’s all but curtains for the rest. Extra props goes out to Milla for performing all her own stunts in the movie, save for one, in which her agent feared she’d get strangled by the hanging wires (the pipe jumping sewer scene near the end).
#2. Sarah Connor – TERMINATOR 2: JUDGMENT DAY (1991)
Buy TERMINATOR 2: JUDGMENT DAY on DVD here
Admittedly, most on our list are probably more appealing to the eye than Linda Hamilton, but I think what makes her role as Sarah Connor so damn badass is at least twofold. First off, going up against Arnold Scwarzenegger is no easy task. Not just diegetically, but personally as well. Made at the apogee of his action-star status, Schwarzenegger physical presence alone would seem to intimidate even the toughest of men, much less any woman. That being said, Hamilton’s impenetrable brawn in TERMINATOR 2: JUDGMENT DAY, in particular the mental institution scenes, really stands out as the dominating force in the film. Secondly, the practicality of Hamilton’s stunts and physical rigors, largely bereft of tackily overused CG, really lends far more credence to what she’s capable of in the film. In other words, there’s a verisimilitude to her role that others on our list can’t really compete with. An interesting bit of trivia: Linda Hamilton’s twin sister Leslie stood in for some mirror imaging, and Linda lost permanent hearing in one ear after failing to plug her ears during the elevator shootout scene. Now that’s dedication!
#1. Ellen Ripley – ALIEN (1979)
Our most historical list entry therefore becomes an intrinsic trailblazer, Sigourney Weaver’s Ellen Ripley in the ALIEN franchise has clearly inspired all that has succeeded her. What’s interesting is to note the evolution of Ripley, who starts out as a mere survivor, albeit an intelligent one, then morphs into a full-fledged action-heroine, boasting a physical prowess and toting as many high powered weapons as any male counterpart, in and out of her own universe. Then there’s the androgynous look, the increasing short hair and warrior-like fatigues, even the name itself has a masculinity that’s indicative of her unmatched strength. In fact, an early draft of the original ALIEN script was written with Ripley as a man (Veronica Cartwright was also originally tapped to play Ripley, but instead ended up playing Lambert). With all that said, Sigourney does a splendid job of melding a fetching femininity with those distinctly male traits listed above. She fuses a true sex appeal with realistic tenor of threat, someone you could be attracted to and afraid of at once. A true Weaver indeed!
Follow the JOBLO MOVIE NETWORK
Follow us on YOUTUBE
Follow ARROW IN THE HEAD
Follow AITH on YOUTUBE