Last Updated on August 5, 2021
It seems that the majority of you agreed that ALIEN 3 deserved to be the winner of our last Face-Off. In fact, some peeps refused to even acknowledge ALIEN: RESURRECTION as a part of the series! Good for them! And good for YOU now, because here comes our next Face-Off installment!
Yes, to stay a tad current with Abraham Lincoln out there right now hunting vampires, today’s Face-Off lists a couple of “unlikely monstrous” hunters of monsters. In the blood red corner, we have one bad-ass mutha who likes his stakes through the heart: Blade! In the fiery orange corner, we have one tortured soul of a daredevil: Ghost Rider!. Let the craziness begin!
Cool
The low, smooth voice, the fresh ‘do, the killer tattoos, the black jacket, and of course, them shades! This man oozes cool out of every orifice. It’s a damn shame he doesn’t have much time for the ladies ’cause he could get laid faster than Charlie Sheen at an all-you-can-drink tiger blood party (see my little Major League reference there?).
With a name like Johnny Blaze, you best be bringing your A-game when it comes to coolness. Fortunately, with his leather jacket and tricked-out Harley, Ghost Rider is a super hero version of The Fonz (only much crazier, thank you, Mr. Cage). And, Mr. GH doesn’t mind using his mad skills to impress the ladies, especially Ms. Eva Mendes.
Weaponry
Whistler, Blade’s weapons specialist, has concocted some pretty sweet anti-vamp artillery starting with the classic Glaive, a double-bladed boomerang made of sliver. And, as the dude’s name states, he’s got one hell of a blade in his Daywalker Sword. Plus, countless firearms, silver spikes, and EDTA darts, this mutha-f*cka is loaded!
With the help of hellfire, Ghost Rider is able to keep some bad ass weapons at his disposal such as his flaming chain that he whips all over the place like Indiana Jones, laying waste to whatever gets wrapped up in it. His most wickedly brutal device for destruction, however, would have to be the Penance Stare which is literally a soul crusher!
Vehicle
A black 1968 Dodge Charger! How’s that for classically cool? This automobile was built for speed and features numerous modifications (most likely Whistler’s handiwork) for tracking down or mowing over vamps. It’s equipped with UV lights behind the front grill as well as numerous switches inside for bringing all kinds of noise.
Not quite as subtle as Blade’s vehicle, GR’s heavily, hellishly customized hardtail chopper named “Grace” turns violently into the “Hell Cycle” whenever the “Rider” takes over. Blazing and bone-covered this bad bike tackles inhuman speeds and can take Mr. GR anywhere, including up walls of buildings!
Best Kills
With his trusty sword and fighting skills, Blade has definitely left behind a bloody batch of dead bad guys. I give top props to his bomb trickery upon Scud and the splitting in two of Rienhardt (both in part II). However, here’s a little clue as to my all-time fave: “Some motherfucker’s always trying to ice skate uphill.” Yup, it is Blade’s send off to Frost with a kicked silver spike to the eye (which leads to one engorged explosion of plasma) that takes the cake!
With an R-rating, I’m thinking that Ghost Rider’s kills would have come off as so much more monumental than the “CGI-PG-13” route. Regardless, we do get Blackheart facing his fiery penance by a thousand tortured souls and Blackout being dashed into roadkill. However, the one I actually dig the most is kinda simplistic: GR whips his burning chain around Abrigor and sort of disintegrates him from the outside in.
Drinking Buddy
I picture a quiet, relaxed night at the bar with Blade (unless some vamps show up). He doesn’t seem like much of a talker. I also believe that we’d be drinking something either larger or stronger than a typical glass of beer. He’s a buff dude, and would require something pretty hardcore in terms of alcohol in order to truly kick back. And I like that!
I just picture Ghost Rider welcoming the chance to share a few cold ones at some biker bar, especially after a bout with his hot-headed alter ego. And considering GR’s unpredictable behavior, you’d probably never know whether you’d be cracking up or getting into a brawl. You could have a surprising drinking adventure every time out. Now, that’s exciting!
Blade
Well, Hell’s bells, we have a winner! Congrats to Blade for being the baddest of the bad boy boogeyman bashers! This really was a close one to call. I had toyed with the idea of calling the “Cool” category a tie because, honestly, they’re both so damn cool! But that would have caused this Face-Off to end in a tie and I know how all the fanboys out there would get their Batman underoos in a bunch about me copping out and such. So, I made my choice and it went to the Daywalker. Now, let me know you’re choice by spitting them bullets below! And, please feel free to send any future Face-Off ideas to me at [email protected].
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