Head Over Heels

Review Date:
Director: Mark S. Waters
Writer: Ron Burch and David Kidd
Producers: Julia Dray and Robert Simonds
Actors:
Freddie Prinze Jr. as Jim Winston, Monica Potter as Amanda Pierce, Shalom Harlow as Jade
Plot:
A down-and-out girl moves in with some over-the-top models and falls in love with a goofy-but-loveable guy from across the street. Aaaaaaaaah! Then one day, she sees him knock a woman upside the head with a baseball bat. Ooooooooh! She must then join together with her model-friends to find out whether or not this guy is really goofy-but-loveable, or a psycho killer. Aaaaaaaaah!
Critique:
Completely idiotic. Okay, so maybe I’m being a little too nice. This movie starts off dumb, moves into the ridiculous and eventually graduates to idiocy. There…that’s more like it! And how, you may ask? Well, it’s simple really. Four of the dumbest stereotypical models in the world (oh my God, I just found out that the actresses playing the parts are models in real life…yipes!) join Monica Potter (in a role which can only be described as an obvious cry for help) and Freddie Prinze Jr. (not the actor, but the character better known as Freddie Prinze Jr.), in a plot so stupid and far-fetched, that you have to wonder once more, how crap like this gets by the Hollywood bigwigs. This thing stinks to high-heaven. It’s just plain embarrassing for everyone involved. I even felt my IQ dip below its usual low as toilet humor somehow worked its way into this so-called romantic-comedy-action movie? Ugh. What a pile of dung. Hey, I’m actually starting to sound a little like Harry Knowles here, but I guess I could see where his frustration comes from time to time. It’s sad really. A movie which actually had quite a few people in my audience laughing at its idiocy, including the over-used “folks hiding in the bathroom while someone else comes in to take a crap and fart” gag . And how about that dumb blonde model who keeps running into things. Pure hilarity! Or maybe I’m just too jaded, too much of a critic, not relaxed enough to enjoy this fluff-piece…uuuhhmmm…naaaaah!! This movie sucks the big one.

It’s chockfull of stupid characters delivering inane dialogue fitting snuggly into a preposterous plot. This is the kind of movie that has one character inserting another character into a car headfirst to the floor only because…well, it’s supposed to be funny, see? You see, that person then has their legs swinging in the other person’s face as they drive and that distracts the driver, see, and well, that’s kinda funny, no? Harumph…yeah, well…you get the picture! Anyhoo, Freddie Prinze Jr….nuff said. Monica Potter, a bad career move, but we might forgive you if you keep up the Julia Roberts bit. The rest of the model girls…well, thanks for being there so I had something to look at, but please apologize to the entire modeling community as a whole, for making them all out to be complete imbeciles!! So why the three points out of ten, you may ask? Well, it’s simple really. One point goes to the Russian model girl and that cool accent (don’t ask me why, but it actually turned me on). One point goes out to all of the model girls for being in the movie (nice window decoration…natch!). And one last point goes out to the makers of this film, who spared us any long sorted story, and made sure to give us the opportunity of leaving the theatre after only 90 minutes of manufactured garbage, so that we could run out as fast as we can, grab the next person that we see walking down the street and warn them of the devil that is…Freddie Prinze Jr…I mean, HEAD OVER HEELS. You’ve been warned, good people.

PS: Didja notice how I didn’t even mention REAR WINDOW once in my entire review? I didn’t want to taint the memory of the classic flick by having it uttered alongside this thing, but then again, I just did mention it, but I guess it doesn’t count in the PS section…or does it? Ooooh, whatever…I have a headache! (I think my brain is coming back to life)

(c) 2021 Berge Garabedian

Head Over Heels

CRAP ON A STICK

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