Well, it appeared with our
last Face-Off Winner, no one had any major qualms about Jamie Lee Curtis reigning supreme as horror’s number one Scream Queen. Although, it was more than evident that Danielle Harris definitely brings the hotness.
For our latest Face-Off, we decided to go the real steel route and pit two mostly metal cyborg-style heavyweights against each other. Whether they’re in the future or traveling to the past, they’re about to do battle in the present at AITH. It’s time to pit Robocop against Terminator!
“Dead or alive… you’re coming with me.”
Even though the T-800’s catchphrase has stood the test of time, I’m giving the edge here to Robo. Why, you ask? Well, I’ll tell ya: sure, The Terminator’s line is great, but what does it say about him in terms of a character? That he’s going to return? Sure, but that’s about it. You don’t get the full summation of this cyborg’s conviction like you do with Robocop’s blunt affirmation. Plus, Robo’s catchphrase is used twice in the film to perfect plot-enhancing effect, so if anyone has a problem with that… drop it, creep!
“I’ll be back.”
So simple! So to the point! And with stone cold authority! There might not be a more iconic line from a film and it’s only three words! I’m almost certain that any time someone utters this phrase, they think of Arnold and his robotic assassin alter ego. It’s spoken as both a farewell and a grave warning and positively pops with bad-ass electricity. How many times has a 3-word sentence become the calling card for a towering action star? Impressive.
When did his fellow human police officers realize that Robo was a bad-ass force to be reckoned with? The second he whipped out that modified 9-millimeter Beretta in the shooting range and began blowing the target board to bits. Then, when he started using it on the bad guys, the three-shot bursts causing flesh to explode, the criminal underworld knew they had the right to remain scared shitless.
Although the T-800 has manned many a weapon, what he is most associated with is the simple shotgun. Ironic, considering he’s an advanced machine from the future. However, there’s nothing more menacing than watching him walking into a room with his shotgun held high or aiming it forward while riding a motorcycle.
Yes, Robo brought a whole new meaning to the phrase “protect and serve”. With a strong directive to clean up the streets of Detroit, he went above and beyond, taking on “Red” from That 70’s Show and his evil band of drug-dealing cohorts. He even stands up to giant, machine gun-firing robots as well as upgraded “cyborg” versions of himself. At the end of the day, his catch phrase still holds true: “Dead or alive… you’re coming with me.”
The Terminator is specifically programmed to do one of two things: either kill off John Connor or protect John Connor… at any cost. He performs the tasks very admirably, especially the protection one where he took down newer, more advanced terminators that seemed impossible to destroy. The only reason this category doesn’t end in a tie is because, technically, he didn’t fully complete his first mission.
It would be pretty tough to take down Robo. He’s essentially bulletproof, weighs a ton, and sports some serious fire power. If you want to even try to slow him down, you have to basically have a militia of shooters with automatic weapons or the biggest blow torch in the world. But, he is still at the mercy of his motherboard and can be programmed to shut down if he tries to arrest certain bad guys.
This cyborg is nearly unstoppable. Even if you fill him full of bullets, he’s still got that hardcore endoskeleton underneath, which ain’t going down unless you happen to have a hydraulic press handy. In fact, the only truly effective way for the Terminator to be destroyed is to cause it to happen by himself (though he can not self-terminate). That’s tough stuff.
Though mostly machine, Robo is still able to somehow remember small parts of the life he had as a human. And even tough his programming is against it, he still strives to be more man than machine. Hence, his understanding of and therefore, adaptability towards conveying sides of the human condition is superior.
At first, one wouldn’t even consider the Terminator a candidate for the human condition. However, as exemplified at the end of T2, he is able to learn the value of human life: “I know now why you cry…” Unfortunately, he also seals his own fate for, at least, this category: “but it’s something I could never do.”
One thing is fo’sho… Robo never shies away from blowing assholes away! My iron man was responsible for somewhere on the upside of roughly 45 bad guy deaths. Talk about dishing out the right to remain deathly silent! Considering his weapon as well as his catchphrase, it’s no surprise how well Robo excells in adding up them bodies!
Even though his name would suggest a huge number, our Terminator only managed to do away with about 24 kills. Even though both his and Robo’s numbers may not be perfectly precise, there is still enough of a glaring differential to see who the victor is. It didn’t help that in T2, the Terminator was ordered by a squeeky-voiced teeny-bopper to not kill anyone.
Well, holy shit, I was not expecting this. The Terminator got terminated?! Seriously, this was a massacre. Robocop was truly firing on all cylinders here. Now, I’m sure many of you will be super pissed about this result, however that is why you have a loaded machine gun down below. Please, spit them bullets of contempt or praise. We always LOVE hearing back from you because your sick opinions matter! And, if you have any future ideas for some killer Face-Offs, don’t be afraid to email me at
[email protected].