We all had some silly holiday fun with our last
Face-Off. The killer snowman Jack Frost defeated the killer Santa Billy from Silent Night, Deadly Night just in time to score some tasty milk and cookies.
Now, the holidays are over, which can be pretty depressing… however horror is the perfect cure! Plus, it’s still wintertime which can produce some nice snowy action. In fact, it is currently snowing outside my window (no joke). This inspired us to pit two similarly themed snowy horror efforts against each other and watch as the white stuff is stained red. So curl up by the fire with some booze-infused hot chocolate as we prepare for 30 Days of Night vs. Dead Snow!
Thankfully, 30 Days does not shy away from the gore factor for a second! This is how a movie about vampires is supposed to roll. We are treated to graphic depictions of people getting their necks torn apart, heads being blown and chopped off, necks being snapped, and much more. One dude’s arm is even ripped off, with bone still sticking out.
It really is amazing and hilarious (in a good way) how gleefully and rapidly Dead Snow lets the gore fly. Once those Nazi bastard zombies start popping up out of the snow, nothing is safe or sacred. A dude’s head gets pulled apart, allowing his entire brain to fall to the floor. There are tons of bloody bashings, stabbings, and amputations. Plus, entrails are exposed in several new, creative manners.
Oh this is a harsh one. After Hartnett and a recently bit “Billy” shred a vampire in this heavy-duty machine, Billy’s hand ends up getting lopped off as well. He begins to scream and turn to a vampire, thus alerting the other bloodsuckers to Hartnett’s location. Ol’ Joshy has no choice but to bury an ax just beneath Billy’s chin. Only one swing won’t do. Hartnett has to take a few more whacks till Billy’s head is dangling off to the side.
Oh, how the tough character “Vegard” gets the shit end of the stick in terms of a death scene. Don’t get me wrong, it is gloriously grotesque, but sure had to hurt! The dude first gets stabbed by five zombies standing around him. Then, as he’s bleeding, each undead bastard grabs an appendage (two arms, two legs, and a head) and proceeds to rip it free from its section on the torso.
Remember when Josh Hartnett used to be in movies, particularly genre movies? Yes, it’s been a while, but that just feels strange because I never found the dude annoying or trying to play off his pretty boy image. This is currently the case in 30 Days. He plays a very likable, subdued Alaskan officer of the law, who makes no bones about protecting his community at all cost.
It takes quite some time before a true hero is established in Snow, but by the time the credits roll, you clearly know that it’s Vegar Hoel as “Martin”. What’s cool about his hero is that it is very similar to Bruce Campbell’s “Ash” of Evil Dead fame. He’s funny, a tad awkward, but still kicks ass to get the job done. He also has no qualms about sawing off his own infected appendage.
Melissa George is a beautiful genre lady, yet she also possesses this keen sense of toughness that is truly unique. This is probably because you wouldn’t expect someone as gorgeous as her also kicking ass. Yet Miss George does just that as a police officer and Hartnett’s semi-ex. It ain’t easy surviving a huge vampire onslaught, but Melissa definitely had the chops to do so, despite hiding through a lot of it.
You could just tell that the character of “Hanna” was a bad ass. I’m not sure if it was the way she cussed or those darn dreadlocks, but she just came off as a bitch not to be f*cked with. And she certainly proved this when the time came to battle the snow zombies on her own. She truly earns her degree in kick ass upon taking out a zombie on a cliff… by stamping the snowy overhang causing herself to fall as well!
In order to rescue Melissa George from certain death, Josh Hartnett makes the ultimate sacrifice of injecting vampire-tainted blood into himself in order to ascertain enough strength to fight the blood suckers before he fully turns! Talk about bad f*cking ass! The dude then throws down with the head vampire and eventually punches through its mouth and out the back of its head! The rest of the vampire followers flee in fear. Boom!
After slicing and chopping his way through countless Nazi zombies, Martin finally thinks the worst is over. Then, about a hundred more undead f*cks come bursting up from the snow. Realizing that he has no chance and that the zombies only want the trinket box he his friends took, he runs off, retrieves the box, and returns it to the zombies. Martin attempts to escape in a car, but discovers a coin from the box still in his pocket… and Herzog, the head zombie, is right outside the driver’s side window!
Ah, nothing like a tight race to ring in the new year! It’s still currently snowing outside as 30 Days of Night takes the first Face-Off of 2015. There’s still plenty of red-soaked snow out on this battlefield and I’m curious as to which way you feel this bout should have gone. Both flicks are quite well-made and entertaining, so I’m sure opinions are bound to be varied on this one. So, blast them bullets below! And feel free to send any future Face-Off ideas to me at
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