Categories: Movie Reviews

Cruel Intentions

Review Date:
Director: Roger Kumble
Writer: Roger Kumble
Producers: Neal H. Moritz
Actors:
Sarah Michelle Gellar
Ryan Phillippe
Reese Witherspoon
Plot:
Rich spoiled stepsister bets rich spoiled stepbrother that he will not be able to seduce an angelic, self-proclaimed “virgin till she falls in love” peach from Kansas. With manipulation methods in full-gear, our boy takes on the task, knowing full well that a victory will prize him a shot at his stepsister’s own honey (“You can put it anywhere”, she promises). A miss however, will mean the relinquishing of his own 1956 Jaguar to said sibling.
Critique:
I hate to say it but I actually had a fun time at this movie. It was never boring, always nice to look at, didn’t take itself too seriously, and actually managed to convey an interesting, if not over-the-top yet amusing, story line. If you’re between the ages of 15 and 21, I am willing to bet my monkey that you will truly enjoy this movie to the max! Most of the audience with whom I saw it this picture were of that age, and seemed quite rambunctious and favorable about their appreciation of this film.

More than anything, I thought that the movie was a beauty to behold, with its beautiful people leading the way to beautiful clothes, leading to beautiful homes, leading to beautiful cars, and well, you get the picture. The actors were catty and enjoyable to watch, if only for their grandiose manners, and their capacity to remind me of an ill-fated, but a guilty pleasure nonetheless, dramatic TV series from the 1980s called “Dynasty”. Think of this movie as a better-looking version of that show called Dynasty Jr., with a whole lot more emphasis on raw sexuality. Meanwhile, actor Ryan Phillippe continues to score points as the young, innocent looking boy with the big, puffy lips. His real-life sweetum, Reese Witherspoon is also very effective in her role as the cuddly-as-can-be virgin, but more than anyone, it is Sarah Michelle Gellar that takes the proverbial cake as the baddest bitch from hell! She must’ve had a blast making this movie, cause her role goes all out!! All in all, I recognize the fact that this film is not gonna change the world or anything, but it was nice to look during its quick runtime, had a decent soundtrack, and offered quite a few laughs with a cool ending. Tight-asses beware, this one’s not for you! This film is not to be taken seriously. Laugh along, and you might just enjoy it 🙂

Note: The film is strung with sexual situations, with attempts at feather-ruffling coming the way of a clear shot of Phillippe’s hard apple behind, some under-the-cover male homosexual activity, and an extreme close-up of Sarah Michelle and co-star Selma Blair french-kissing.

(c) 2021 Berge Garabedian
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