CAST THIS: Megan Fox

I understand this may be kind of a confusing title, but I didn’t really know how else to phrase it. No, someone is not making a biopic about the rise and fall of Hollywood’s hottest trash-talking actress Megan Fox (yet), but her departure from TRANSFORMERS 3 is shaping up to be a pretty epic story.

Fox has been a staple of the series for two movies, after the first one propelled her from being an unknown to super stardom. But during interviews she started shitting on director Michael Bay, saying he was a pain to work with and even comparing him to Hitler. Because that’s always mature.

Well, the crew banded together to tell Megan off, saying SHE was the pain to work with and was a turbo bitch on set. Bay responded by laughing her insults off, crediting her youth for her behavior, but now Fox is officially gone from the set, with both sides claiming it was their decision.

Right now, those behind the film are saying “giving Shia a new love interest makes more sense for the story.” So here we are, giving Shia a new love interest in this week’s column. Who should replace MEGAN FOX?

This is a weird casting column, because we don’t have a set character in mind. I guess I really just want to see which young up-and-coming actresses you guys throw out there, and who you think really needs their big break like Fox had in the original film. With or without Fox, T3 will be huge, and it will give whoever steps up to the plate a chance to shine.

And by shine I mean run in slow motion away from explosions while their boobs jiggle.

Update: I’ve just seen that there is an alleged “wishlist” the studio has of potential Fox replacements, but that’s cool, I want to hear who YOU guys would pick. 

Last Week: I DREAM OF JEANNIE

We seem to be a on a female roll with Cast This lately, but I’m sure as shit not complaining. The results of last week’s recasting of I DREAM OF JEANNIE? I’m not sure I’ve ever seen so much blonde hair in one lineup.

1. Kristen Bell (20%) 2. Anna Faris (14%) 3. Alice Eve (8%)

You guys love your Kristen Bell. She is one of my favorite young perky blonde actresses out there, but I’m not convinced that this is the part for her. Anna Farris is the go-to for blonde and funny, but she seems a bit obvious here.

I actually really like the third place pick of Alice Eve, she was the bright spot of an otherwise mediocre movie in SHE’S OUT OF MY LEAGUE, and can actually act in addition to being the last girl to literally make my jaw drop in a film during one scene in particular. I say give her a shot at it.

OK, how about Megan Fox part deux?