Enough Talk! Give Us Evil Dead 4!
The past few years have allowed
me to revisit many of the people that helped shape my unhealthy obsession toward
film in the 80s. Indiana Jones was back in the hat, John McClane was once again
in the wrong place at the wrong time, Michael Myers and Jason Voorhees were back
murdering on their home turfs, Edgar Frog had some more vampire trouble, and
somebody mistakenly pissed off John Rambo again. Some were great to catch up
with, some should have remained buried in the dark depths of my memories. None
of them will ever measure up, however, if I get to see Ashley J. Williams fit
his stump into another chainsaw. Sure there’s been comics, video games,
seventeen separate DVD releases, a musical, companion books, Bruce books, and
more comics, but I want a brand new story in a very familiar setting (I’m not
huge on the ARMY OF DARKNESS locale). I want a boomstick, lots of blood, a
beat-down cabin with somebody in the cellar, and that larger than life moment
when we realize Ash is back to kick some demonic booty. And I want all this at
my local theatre.
Word on the street is that Sam
Raimi has his horror groove back with the upcoming DRAG ME TO HELL. While
touring for said movie he has hinted that EVIL DEAD 4 is on track for him after
he’s done with SPIDERMAN 4. I was sitting in the audience at Comic-Con when he
took the question head on and said that him and his brother where ready to
discuss the story the next time they got together. The latest bit of info comes
from Empire Magazine, which quotes Raimi with this “We’ve got nine pages so far.
Every time I’m with my brother Ivan, we write another page of it.” He goes on to
add “There’s some dialogue. Ash being an idiot. Ash taking some abuse. Some
character stuff and then some structure of Act Two.” He went on to confirm the
script is being written with only Bruce Campbell in mind. Why am I having a hard
time believing all this shit?
Maybe it’s because I’ve been
hearing the same rumours for over a decade. There’s been remakes, reimaginings,
a versus film with Freddy and Michael, an adaptation of the musical, and even
casting calls for Ash‘s son. None of which came to fruition as far as the big
screen is concerned. Or maybe it’s because the man himself, Bruce Campbell, has
done nothing but humorously skate around the question every time it’s asked. I
attended a screening for MY NAME IS BRUCE last year and he compared the
character’s comeback to that of Indiana Jones – too old and out of shape. “Who
wants to see that?” he asked the audience. I do sir, I do. Ash may be a badass
when specific moments call for it but, for the most part, he’s just a royal
fuck-up. Getting your ass handed to you by a headless demon works when you’re
fifty just as much as it did when you were thirty.
Maybe it’s the booze talking
but I think the excuses have run out for everybody involved with this project.
When you can guarantee a film is going to make money, isn’t that enough to get
it done? There’s a trilogy of films out there that is loved by young and old
fanboys alike. A trilogy that gave Sam Raimi and Bruce Campbell careers. I hate
to say filmmakers ever owe their audience anything, so I won’t. They owe it to
themselves.