The thing about The Thing…
I’ve been known to shoot my mouth off all over this site about how untouchable John Carpenter’s THE THING is. Starting in March, somebody’s taking a giant shoe to my nuts and slapping my mouth shut. That’s when the prequel, penned by ‘Battlestar Galactica’ executive producer, Ronald D. Moore, starts shooting just down the 401 from me in Toronto. Is this a good thing? Let’s take a closer look.
No, this isn’t a good thing. How’s that for in-depth analysis? Here’s a story we all know the end to, played out by an all Norwegian cast, speaking English, no doubt (there’s no way a big budget North American Horror film is going to use sub-titles for an entire film), and some dogs. The setting is the exact same (snowy), the alien is the exact same (shape-shifting), and the outcome has already been spelled out for us (everybody=dead). We even know who the alien is at the end of this story thus eliminating any chance of equaling the mystery and suspense of the original’s final frames. There was a lot of story left to tell within this saga, I just think they might of went the wrong way with it (attn. Mr. Lucas).
Is there any hope at all? You bet your ass there is. The fact that Moore is creating this world does wonders for my curiosity. Battlestar is a television event that is very near and dear to my heart and the man knows how to mix character within the science fiction. The special effect possibilities regarding the alien are endless in today’s computer generated world and the filmmakers should know to be at the top of their game in this aspect. You do not want to be embarrassed by a film that’s almost 30 years old when it comes to monster make-up (there is still a 90% chance that this is exactly what will happen). Maybe we get to see the mothership land and/or get to know the aliens a little better. Did they crash? What do they want? What did it look like before it started consuming Earthlings? These are some questions that could be worth answering.
Maybe it’s the booze talking but maybe a sequel would be the lesser of two evils here. Have somebody come discover the bodies of the original chaos and bring the host back to civilization. Let that crazy fucker run wild in the streets of Chicago or some such shit as opposed to telling us a story we already know the punchline to. This has “same shit, different decade” written all over it.