Before Harley Quinn’s big emancipation, there was this decidedly less fantabulous version of BIRDS OF PREY…
Director: Hey, Shawn Levy directed an episode!
Stars: Ashley Scott, Dina Meyer, Rachel Skarsten
After her dad abandoned Gotham, Batman and Catwoman’s daughter now protects the city alongside Black Canary’s psychic daughter and retired Batgirl-turned-tech-guru Barbara Gordon.
BIRDS OF PREY is truly a relic of its time on the WB Network. It has the same goofy stank of live-action superhero entertainment from that era—movies like DAREDEVIL (leather costumes and bad rock music) and TV shows like SMALLVILLE (soapy romances and young adult drama). I remember not caring much for this when it first came out, but revisiting it now, after two decades of more serious Batman movies, the fun and cheesy tone has a llittle more charm to it.
The show ran for a single 13-episode season and centered on the next generation of Gotham crimefighters. The titular avian heroes include:
Helena Kyle a.k.a. Huntress (Ashley Scott): Helena is Batman and Catwoman’s daughter, a metahuman with super feline powers (i.e. her eyes turn in to cat eyes and she fights good). She only found out her dad was Bruce Wayne after the Joker killed her mom, leaving her to be taken in by Barbara Gordon, who trained her to be a vigilante. Scott is great in this role, pulling off both the acerbic banter and the action scenes in believable ways. Even if her crimefighting outfit is highly impractical.
Barbara Gordon a.k.a. Oracle (Dina Meyer): The former Batgirl was shot by the Joker the same night Catwoman was killed, prompting Batman to flee Gotham and abandon his daughter. Now confined to a wheelchair, Barbara has become “a master of the cyber realms,” which is a fancy way of saying she’s stuck in front of a bad greenscreen running coms for the rest of the team. Dina Meyer does what she can with the role, which is mostly shouting random scientific gibberish like, “I’ve analyzed the drug’s antidote matrix!” And in her few flashback scenes, she makes a better Batgirl than Alicia Silverston ever did.
Dinah Redmond a.k.a. um, Dinah Redmond? (Rachel Skarsten): The daughter of very loud superheroine Black Canary, Dinah is the new recruit on the team and spends most of the season honing her psychic powers and never getring a cool moniker like the other Birds. She also gets saddled with all the traditional CW/WB high school storylines, like learning that it’s wrong to use your mind-control powers to get a guy to ask you to the prom.
Nobody ever had the heart to tell the paralyzed Barbara Gordon when she was letting one rip.
If you’re wondering how BIRDS OF PREY might connect to the larger DC Universe, the pilot’s introduction shows all the old heroes and villains in action—Batman, Catwoman, Batgirl, and even the Joker. The designs are clearly based off of Tim Burton’s take on the characters, even if the suits they use are reportedly just repainted versions of the BATMAN AND ROBIN costumes.
Bruce Wayne is frequently referenced (Helena calls him “a guy with a really aggressive hobby”) and was clearly set up to make an appearance in the second season that ultimately never happened. Alfred is also a supporting character (played by Mr. Pitt from Seinfeld), serving the Birds of Prey and not-so-silently judging their life choices. And keep an ear out for Mark Hamill, who graciously lends his voice to their incarnation of the Joker a couple times throughout the season.
I’d like to point out that the pilot also features a brief appearance from Breaking Bad star Aaron Paul as a scumbag who has the honor of being the first person to get his ass kicked by Huntress.
“I’m Batman, bitch!”
The show mostly follows a villain-of-the-week format, as the Birds of Prey combat criminals and other metahumans in New Gotham. (Yes, even though it’s only eight years in the future, for some reason the city has been renamed New Gotham.) However, there is a season-long big bad threaded throughout that is none other than Harley Quinn, who’s been secretly pulling the strings in the criminal underworld to get revenge for Mr. J. FERRIS BUELER’s Mia Sara plays Harley and although she starts off a little shaky in the early episodes, she’s a blast to watch by the end when she gets to fully unleash her inner clown. Although I am confused why nobody in the show seems to know who respected psychiatrist Dr. Harleen Quinzell really is. Every time Huntress goes to her for therapy I kept expecting her to say, “Hey, you look a lot like the crazy girl who dated the guy that destroyed my life.”
Seriously, how did no one figure out this was Harley Quinn?!
There are some things that work about BIRDS OF PREY, but the cheese factor is definitely high if that’s not your thing. It’s the kind of show where every time Helena Kyle does something cat-like, they throw in a random sound effect of a panther roaring to really drive it home. I will say, the action throughout the series is actually pretty good. It’s very much MATRIX inspired—leather trenchcoats, kung fu fights, and lots of wire work and slow-motion—but they usually find ways to vary the action and set pieces depending on the bad guy.
Unfortunately, the writing is painfully bad throughout, kind of par for the course for The WB at this time. For every scene or storyline that works, there’s another that will make you want to fast forward (pretty much all the romantic and high school subplots). And the one-liners are so embarrassing that I refuse to believe it wasn’t done on purpose as some homage to the Adam West Batman. Here’s something a bad guy actually says to one of his victims:
“In the future you might want to consider being a little nicer to people. But I guess you’ll have to use that advice…IN HELL!” breaks his neck
And because subtlety apparently does not exist in New Gotham, every episode ends with the Birds up on the roof of their secret hideout, recapping the show’s themes and talking about what they learned while an Evanescence-like pop song plays.
I’m calling Marvel’s lawyers.
If you want to know what you’re in for, some of the most memorable episodes include:
THREE BIRDS AND A BABY: Huntress rescues a newborn that was thrown off a building and immediately proceeds to get in to an extended fight scene while holding it—spinning and shaking the infant in ways that would absolutely give it permanent brain damage. She takes the baby back to the lab and discovers that she’s adopted a not-so-normal child—it’s a genetically engineered baby created by Harley Quinn because Joker and her always wanted to have kids. It’s been designed to age rapidly so Harley can have an army of “baby assassins” that will serve her and die within a couple days.
Even though the kid is only alive temporarily, [trailer guy voice] the Birds of Prey are going to learn that taking care of a baby is a lot harder than keeping an entire city safe.
LADY SHIVA: Helena’s best friend from high school returns eight years after mysteriously vanishing. Turns out she’s also Batgirl’s former nemesis Lady Shiva, who’s back for revenge after Batgirl accidentally blew up her little sister. In order to stop her once and for all, Barbara Gordon dons a special high-tech batsuit that allows her to walk despite being paralyzed. And even though she’s a paraplegic trying to fight crime, of course she’s still wearing high heels.
SINS OF THE MOTHER: FULL HOUSE star and prison jumpsuit model Lori Loughlin guest stars in the this episode—ironically as a mother who would do anything for her daughter. Loughlin plays the Black Canary, who abandoned Dinah when she was six and left her with foster parents who abused her. Years later she comes back to stop her from becoming a superhero and getting tangled up with a mob boss who, in keeping with the show’s subtle themes, is named Hawk. Black Canary also randomly hates Huntress because (I kid you not, this is actually said by another character)…she’s a bird and Helena’s a cat.
Aunt Becky better practice that Canary Cry before she gets to jail.
REUNION: An invisible man keeps killing all the popular kids at Huntress’ high school reunion. Turns out the bad guy is a nerd who has harbored a very inappropriate crush on Helena and builds a bomb to force her to date him. Also in this episode, someone finally calls Helena out for thinking she has a secret identity despite the fact that she fights crime without wearing a mask. Also also in this episode, Barbara’s boyfriend’s parents don’t like her because she’s in a wheelchair.
FEATS OF CLAY: After someone drinks a chemical that allows him to turn people in to stone, Huntress goes to visit Clayface in Arkham Asylum to get more information. The two develop a SILENCE OF THE LAMBS relationship, with Clayface channeling Hannibal Lecter and saying he’ll only help her if she lets him sculpt her. (“I work in clay, but my real raw material is human emotion!”) In a predictable twist, the bad guy ends up being Clayface’s son Chris Cassius. (GET IT?!) And in a not-so-predictable twist, turns out Clayface was the person who killed Helena’s mom, Catwoman.
DEVIL EYES: Harley Quinn steals hypnosis powers from a metahuman and uses them to takes over the Batcave and turn people, including Huntress and Alfred, in to her thought slaves. Her big dastardly plan that was teased the entire season? Take over the TV airwaves to send out a signal to brainwash people, which is pretty much the same bad guy plan as the Riddler in BATMAN FOREVER.
Other episodes include one where Huntress gets kidnapped and forced to compete in a female fight club, another where the team takes on a villain made of water and uses a flamethrower to…burn him to death, and a very special episode where Huntress finds out her cop boyfriend is actually the son of Gotham’s most notorious crime boss. (My favorite part of that last episode is that they recast the actor who played the crime boss and just casually mention that he had facial reconstructive surgery.)
“Boss, we have a bunch of cool designs for Clayface that will…”
“F*ck you! Just literally throw some clay on that guy’s face.”.
I wouldn’t call it a great show, but BIRDS OF PREY did get better as it went along and showed some potential. I’m sure there would’ve been the same goofy elements in a second season, but it still might’ve been cool to see what they did with other Batman villains. At lesat Huntress and Oracle got a (very brief) cameo in the CW’s recent Crisis on Infinite Earths crossover.
Harley Quinn has a fairly revealing shower scene for network TV.
Untouched by Jared Leto! Buy this movie here!
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Thanks to Charlotte for suggesting this week’s column!
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