Last Updated on July 27, 2021
Now that the football season is over it’s gonna be a long 7 months before the regular season return of many people’s favorite smashmouth sport. To help you get through those lean, dark times I’m gonna give you some great movie sports that bring violence to the screen like a hooker brings STD’s to a bachelor party.
A number of this week’s entries aren’t horror films per se, but anyone who has seen these brutal throwdowns will admit that the level of blood letting, head banging, carnage inducing mayhem at play is enough to charm any horror fan’s heart.
So kick back, pop open a brew, and get your S.O. to wear a sports jersey and nothing else. It’s time to watch some muthaf*ckers get Jacked Up!
Of all the underground martial arts death match tournaments we’ve seen in movies, my favorite by far is the Kumite. JCVD rocks his first staring role bringing the “real” story of Frank Dux to life as he competes against a bunch of violent nobodies and Bolo Yeung. We get to see massive blood splatter, broken knees, crushed skulls and general ass-kicking mayhem. Good f*cking times!
The Most Dangerous Game was the first short story in English class that made me think, “Hmmm, this stuff doesn’t all suck.” The concept of man hunting man is just endlessly fascinating. So anytime you throw that jazz on screen I’m gonna be there. My fav take is this example where we get to see Rutger Hauer and Gary Busey among others tracking down Ice-T. It’s just good old fashion testosterone laced killin’.
Do you know anybody who doesn’t want a shot at Master/Blaster in the Thunderdome. If you do they’re pussies. I don’t ever remember a cage match to the death looking like so much f*cking fun. At some point they should run an actual Thunderdome in either Vegas or Miami (screw Jai Alai), but until then you can just dig on one of the longest, most brutal beatdowns you’re ever gonna see.
It’s simple, a bunch of college students go around shooting each other with darts and the one who is left “alive” wins the game. That changes radically, however, when the defending champion gets taken out by a lucky shot, and then loses his mind. Unable to deal with losing he gets himself a real gun, real bullets, and goes on an excellent murderous stalking rampage that features pre-Terminator Linda Hamilton as his final prey. The best part is that the game is completely playable amongst you and your friends. Just leave the real bullets out of it.
Hate me if you want, but I didn’t think the first AvP was all that bad. It was a pretty fun ride, and the base idea is awesome. Predators hunting Aliens through a giant shifting pyramid. What’s not to like? The weapons are cool, the conflicts intense and the joy of watching these two badass bad boys go mano a mano is just plain fun.
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