HORROR TEN SPOT: Top 10 Violent Movie Sports

Last Updated on August 3, 2021

Now that the football season is over (congrats to the NY Giants BTW) it’s gonna be a long 7 months before the regular season return of many people’s favorite smashmouth sport. To help you get through those lean, dark times I’m gonna give you some great movie sports that bring violence to the screen like a hooker brings STD’s to a bachelor party.

A number of this week’s entries aren’t horror films per se, but anyone who has seen these brutal throwdowns will admit that the level of blood letting, head banging, carnage inducing mayhem at play is enough to charm any horror fan’s heart.

So kick back, pop open a brew, and get your S.O. to wear a sports jersey and nothing else. It’s time to watch some muthaf*ckers get Jacked Up!

1. The Game; THE BLOOD OF HEROES

The sport so f*cking cool it has spawned an actual league based on it. Called only “The Game” in the movie, we watch Juggers travel over barren wastes to play in various towns and earn one hard ass living. What’s the object? Put a dog’s skull on a stake. Think that sounds easy, watch the movie. Then get back to me. Just keep in mind to win this game you have to get past the likes of Rutger Hauer, Vincent D’Onofrio, Delroy Lindo and Joan Chen. Good luck.

2. Battle Royale; BATTLE ROYALE

Take a bunch of school kids, put ’em on an island, and make them fight until only one remains. Keep things interesting by giving them a host of effective, and not so effective, weapons. Plus they are all fitted with an explosive collar so after three days, if no winner has been declared, BOOM! Oh yeah.

3. The Running Man; THE RUNNING MAN

Arnie busting heads and taking names. Once again we’ve got the base subject of a man being hunted by other men, but nobody does this kind of kill or be killed situation with the style that Schwarzenegger does. Add to that the best host of a sporting event ever in Richard Dawson and this unrelenting death match satisfies on just about every level.

4. Transcontinental Road Race; DEATH RACE 2000

I’m no fan of NASCAR personally, but if you make a cross country road race and let the drivers weapon up their cars and kill people for extra points, well I’d be glued to the television. Maybe the competition in Death Race 2000 is a little too violent for a real sport, but damn it’s fun to watch. It also features an ending that gives the most explicit example of a common theme in these movies – the ability of sport to overcome the entrenched power mongering of a corrupt system. But y’know, in an entertaining way.

5. Rollerball; ROLLERBALL

James Caan is fantastic as the best Rollerballer of all time, a dude who is fully ready to give the finger to corporate interference in his beloved game. What’s truly a joy is that while the game starts off as ultraviolent, it turns into an all out bloodbath by the end of the movie as the Powers That Be slowly strip away all of the rules in an attempt to kill off Caan for his stubborn refusal to retire. Big mistake.

6. Hunting Aliens, AVP – ALIEN VS. PREDATOR

Hate me if you want, but I didn’t think the first AvP was all that bad. It was a pretty fun ride, and the base idea is awesome. Predators hunting Aliens through a giant shifting pyramid. What’s not to like? The weapons are cool, the conflicts intense and the joy of watching these two badass bad boys go mano a mano is just plain fun.

7. T.A.G.; TAG – THE ASSASSINATION GAME

It’s simple, a bunch of college students go around shooting each other with darts and the one who is left “alive” wins the game. That changes radically, however, when the defending champion gets taken out by a lucky shot, and then loses his mind. Unable to deal with losing he gets himself a real gun, real bullets, and goes on an excellent murderous stalking rampage that features pre-Terminator Linda Hamilton as his final prey. The best part is that the game is completely playable amongst you and your friends. Just leave the real bullets out of it.

8. Thunderdome; MAD MAX BEYOND THUNDERDOME

Do you know anybody who doesn’t want a shot at Master/Blaster in the Thunderdome. If you do they’re pussies. I don’t ever remember a cage match to the death looking like so much f*cking fun. At some point they should run an actual Thunderdome in either Vegas or Miami (screw Jai Alai), but until then you can just dig on one of the longest, most brutal beatdowns you’re ever gonna see.

9. Hunting The Homeless; SURVIVING THE GAME

The Most Dangerous Game was the first short story in English class that made me think, “Hmmm, this stuff doesn’t all suck.” The concept of man hunting man is just endlessly fascinating. So anytime you throw that jazz on screen I’m gonna be there. My fav take is this example where we get to see Rutger Hauer and Gary Busey among others tracking down Ice-T. It’s just good old fashion testosterone laced killin’.

10. Kumite; BLOODSPORT

Of all the underground martial arts death match tournaments we’ve seen in movies, my favorite by far is the Kumite. JCVD rocks his first staring role bringing the “real” story of Frank Dux to life as he competes against a bunch of violent nobodies and Bolo Yeung. We get to see massive blood splatter, broken knees, crushed skulls and general ass-kicking mayhem. Good f*cking times!